Monthly Archive

A man is not a man, in my opinion, unless he has adequately mastered the art of snoring. When I say mastered, I mean there is more to snoring than the mere act of making ze noise. It is an ancient art... read more..

My daughter-in-law Alma and grandson Eddy were digging for fishing bait in my garden.  Uncovering a many-legged creature, Eddy proudly dangled it before his mother. "No, honey, he won't do for b... read more..

A minister had just finished an excellent dinner at the home of a congregation member when he saw a rooster come strutting through the yard."That's certainly a proud-looking rooster," the minister com... read more..

One of Christ's predictions of what would mark the end of time was the incessant cry from the world for, ?Peace, Peace!? This has come to be more than we could have ever imagined as the multiple layer... read more..

There were two guys working for the city.  One would did a hole, he would dig, dig, dig, the other would come behind him and fill the hole, fill, fill, fill.  These two men worked furiously.... read more..

ABBOTT: Super Duper computer store. Can I help you?COSTELLO: Thanks. I'm setting up an office in my den, and I'm thinking about buying a computer.ABBOTT: Mac?COSTELLO: No, the name's Lou.ABBOTT: Your ... read more..

DEAR PASTOR TIM, WHAT IS YOUR OPINION ON THE REPUBATED ANTI-BIBLICAL BILL THAT WAS PAST TO ALLOW REPUBATES TO MARRY? MY OPINION IS AS FOLLOWS: I AM THOROUGHLY DISGUSTED WITH CANADA AND THE FACT T read more..

Is it easy to hold grudges, rather than forgiving someone? Has someone done something to you or said a harsh word that you've had trouble forgiving? I ran across an article in a magazine where two Mot... read more..

A little boy opened the big and old family Bible with fascination, and looked at the old pages as he turned them.  Suddenly, something fell out of the Bible, and he picked it up and looked at it ... read more..

In the spring of 2003 a young man named Aaron Ralston was hiking alone in the canyons of Utah when an 800 pound boulder shifted and pinned his arm to the canyon wall. He struggled for five days to fre... read more..

Jessica wrote: Dear Tim, I Don't like what your sending me so BACK OFF!! You are an idoit!!!! From Jessie I replied: Dear Jessica, I've removed you from my lists. BTW, "Idoit" is spelled "idiot"... read more..

Two elderly gentlemen are playing cards on Saturday evening as they have done for the past 35 years.  Max, the older, had been having problems remembering what cards were what, and usually needed... read more..

A Catholic priest I once knew went to the hospital to visit patients. Stopping at the nurse’s station, he carefully looked over the patient roster and jotted down the room number of everyone who had "... read more..

What is it we're about as Christians? What is it we're doing? I want to talk about what I did the last couple of weeks. Some of you were around last year--I'd like to think that I have not lost any ... read more..

~ March Planned For Next August ~ Blind Bishop Appointed To See ~ Lingerie Shipment Hijacked--Thief Gives Police The Slip ~ L.A. Voters Approve Urban Renewal By Landslide ~ Patient At Death's Door... read more..

Jack has died. His lawyer is standing before the family and reads out Jack's last will and testament."To my dear wife Esther, I leave the house, 50 acres of land, and one million dollars. To my son Ba... read more..

Pastor Tim Davis, known at Western Speedway as the Pastor of Disaster, was slightly injured last night during the first lap of the A heat in the Claimer Division. Davis, who was driving bac... read more..

Last week my wife sent me to the mall on an errand. Normally I don't like going to the mall, especially by myself, but when my wife sends me, I submit to my husbandly duty. Years ago when I joined her... read more..

Cessna: "Newark tower, Cessna 12345, student pilot, I am out of fuel."Tower: "Roger Cessna 12345, reduce airspeed to best glide!! Do you have the Newark airfield in sight?!?!!"Cessna: "Uh, um...tower,... read more..

The manager of a large office noticed a new man one day and told him to come into his office.  "What is your name?" was the first thing the manager asked the new guy. "John," the new guy replied... read more..

This time of year makes me a bit jittery. It's that time when people ask, "Do you garden?" I take that question personally. I guess it's a hold-over from my Yukon days, but I always have the feeling t... read more..

The pastor of a mid-sized church decided one Monday morning that the staff would verbalize their prayers at the weekly staff meeting. He led off: "Lord, my daughter is about to go away to college, I o... read more..

Today, in an effort to be sophisticated and contemporary, many Christians have stopped trying to persuade others to follow Christ. There's an underlying feeling in our society that nice people just do... read more..

MESS TEST Smear peanut butter on the sofa and curtains.  Now rub your hands in the Wet flower bed and rub on the walls.  Cover the stains with crayons.  Place a fish stick behind the co... read more..

A man limped into a hospital to have his foot X-rayed, and was asked to wait for the results. Some time later an orderly appeared and handed the man a large pill.Just then a mother with a small child ... read more..

If you put a twist on the age old line, ?Why did the chicken cross the road?? and instead ask, ?Why did the church cross the road?? the answers could look like this: Mark Twain would have said, 'the... read more..

Mr. Smith was brought to Mercy Hospital (a Catholic hospital), and taken quickly in for coronary surgery. The operation went well and, as the groggy man regained consciousness, he was reassured by a S... read more..

Two wildlife documentary film makers were filming a wild lion in Africa when they both noticed that the lion was about to attack them.One of the men put down his camera and slowly began changing from ... read more..

The weather is almost unbelievable!  It seemed to never quit raining after the last hurricane. But, when it did, the weather went wild with heat!  Today,it's hitting the 100 mark,with the he... read more..

Taxiing down the tarmac, a jetliner abruptly stopped, turned around and returned to the gate.  After an hour long wait, it finally took off.  A concerned passenger asked the flight attendant... read more..