Monthly Archive

1.  Split dead limb into fragments and shave one fragment into slivers. 2.  Bandage left thumb. 3.  Chop other fragments into smaller fragments 4.  Bandage left foot. 5.  read more..

A fellow computer programmer for a consulting group had designed some software for one of our largest accounts. He asked my help in putting it into operation.At first, he handled most of the work. Eve... read more..

A Sunday School teacher was telling her class how God created everything, including human beings. A young boy in the class seemed especially intent when they told him how Eve was created out of one of... read more..

A small boy stunned his parents when he began to empty his pockets of nickels, dimes and quarters. Finally his mother said, "Where did you get all that money.? "At Sunday school," the boy replied no... read more..

You're No Longer A Kid When...- Driving a car doesn't always sound like fun.- You have friends who have kids.- You are taller than the slide at the McDonald's playland.- Your parents' jokes are now fu... read more..

My daughter and I recently started new jobs on the same day. So lately the dinner table conversation at our house has centred around our new experiences. Last night I had something funny to report. To... read more..

There was this preacher who was an avid golfer. Every chance he could get, he could be found on the golf course swinging away.  It was an obsession.  One Sunday was a picture perfect day fo... read more..

A trio of old veterans were bragging about the heroic exploits of their ancestors one afternoon down at the VFW hall."My great grandfather, at age 13," one declared proudly, "was a drummer boy at Shil... read more..

"Carry me, Daddy," the little girl begged (or whined!), as her tired, spindly little legs could walk no more. Mom and Dad had no car--their wheels were two-legged ones, and so the young family walked read more..

A doctor walked into his office where one of his patients was sitting. The doctor told the patient, "I have good news, and I have bad news.  Which do you want me to tell you first?" The patient... read more..

A grandmother was headed out the door to go to church one Sunday when she got a call from her daughter. 'Would Grandma like to have her three little grandchildren visit while her daughter and son-in-l... read more..

1. If you eat something and no one sees you eat it, it has no calories. 2. If you drink a diet soda with a candy bar, the calories in the candy bar are canceled out by the diet soda. 3. When you eat read more..

It's graduation day, and everybody's going to get their diploma but Chet. At the assembly, the entire senior class stands up and shouts "Let Chet graduate, let Chet graduate!" The principal agrees t... read more..

When one mentions vision, people automatically think of your eyes. Vision does have to do with the eyes, possibly, in more ways than one. For your every day vision, you need to keep your eyes tested a... read more..

Here is an exercise program for those of us whose wisdom exceeds our ambition. The doctor told me "Physical exercise is good for you." I know that I should do it, but my body is out of shape, so I hav... read more..

Old folks are worth a fortune: With silver in their hair, gold in their teeth, stones in their kidneys, lead in their feet and gas in their stomachs.  I have become more social with the passing o... read more..

By adulthood most of us have experience with grieving the loss of someone we love. David has just learned that his best friend, Jonathan and King Saul, Jonathan's father have been killed in battle. Wh... read more..

After harvesting the usual bumper crop of squash last year, I took a half-dozen to the office. I piled them on the table in the break room and posted a sign advertising them as free.The next day I no... read more..

The Iams Pet Professionals, a team of 30 trained customer service representatives at The Iams Company, handle more than 300,000 inquiries a year from pet owners across the country. Although the majori... read more..

Our bodies are amazing acts of creation. As I looked at some of the details of how they work, I was amazed to find just how much our body does. Did you know that in one twenty four hour period your he... read more..

Dear Abby:I have always wanted to have my family history traced, but I can't afford to spend a lot of money to do it.Any suggestions?Sam in California------------------------------------------Dear Sam... read more..

Multimillion-dollar houses came crashing down a hill in Southern California. Power poles popped and cracked as they tumbled right before everyone's eyes. Grabbing their children and pets, many people ... read more..

The boss was very exasperated with his new secretary. She ignored the telephone when it rang."You must answer the telephone," he told her irritably."All right," she replied, "but it seems so silly. Ni... read more..

Bob had finally made it to the last round of the $64,000 Question.  The night before the big question, he told the Emcee that he desired a question on American History. The big night had arrived... read more..

No day is complete for me unless I forget something. It does not matter what I forget as long as what I forget disrupts my day in some way. Rare is the day in May when I forget to forget something. read more..

Kids statements that are a little... off track:* God bless America thru the night with a light from a bulb!* Oh Susanna, Oh don't you cry for me, For I come from Alabama with a band-aid on my knee!* G... read more..

Long, long ago an old Indian chief was about to die, so he called for Geronimo and Falling Rocks, the two bravest warriors in his tribe.  The chief instructed each to go out and seek buffalo skin... read more..

Flowers are beautiful this time of year. Some have been in bloom for awhile; others have just begun to put on buds. The gardens around the area are just blossoming with blooms of all colors, shapes, f... read more..

A professor asked a student to remain for a few moments after class. Holding out the young man's assignment, the professor said, "Did you write this poem all by yourself?"The student said, "Every word... read more..

My husband and I watched a film recently that had a lot to do with discovery. A man with a brilliant brain, insatiable curiosity and more than a little ambition set himself and others on a path that l... read more..