July 2004 - Monthly Archive

30 Jul

Peggie's Den

Pastor Tim

3712

Child of Sorrow...Child of Peace!

A Hurting Word... Someone, somewhere in our world today aborted a child...our hearts break; the heart of God breaks more. For this was not a piece of tissue; this was a child. We grieve at the high ... read more..

30 Jul

Clean Jokes

Pastor Tim

2784

Let Us Know

The following advertisement appeared in a physical culture magazine:"Here's a good test for stomach muscles. Clasp your hands over your head and place your feet together on the floor. Now bend to the ... read more..

29 Jul

Guest Authors

Dr. Harold McNabb

4501

Our Scary World

I wonder if it's safe to leave my house these days. On Canada's west coast we are constantly hearing about the Big One, the cataclysmic earthquake that supposedly is waiting to hurl us all into the se... read more..

28 Jul

Barb's Mantle

Barbara Sanders

3949

In Times Like These

We go through so much turmoil at times and we wonder, "God, are you there? Have you forgotten me?" We don't meant to usurp his power, but we do by even thinking that He would leave us with our trouble... read more..

27 Jul

Melva's Devotions

Melva Cooper

4214

Dale Jr. Drives Until 1st Caution

Even though it had been a week since the fiery crash at Sonoma, the look on Dale, Jr.'s face clearly revealed he was still in pain Sunday when he climbed into his bright red #8 cup car at New Hampsh read more..

27 Jul

Clean Jokes

Pastor Tim

2969

Happy Eggs

One Sunday morning, while stationed at Osan Air Base in South Korea, I was in line for breakfast and noticed that the cook behind the counter looked kind of harassed. After I gave him my order, he ask... read more..

26 Jul

Dr. Harold McNabb

3856

Get Your Prayers Out of Neutral

A church planter named Len Sullivan writes about one of his experiences in prayer: In the mid 1980s, my family moved to northern Saskatchewan to start a church. As a church planter, part of my suppor... read more..

25 Jul

Guest Authors

Pastor Tim

4365

Knowledge and Relationship in Balance

So why is it okay for her to state her offense to me, yet it is not okay for me to make a principled point about a moral issue because it offended her personally? I just got back from San Antoni read more..

24 Jul

The Spur

Marcia Lee Laycock

3348

A Beautiful Mind

{mosimage}Some time ago I was corresponding with a few women from the U.S. We were on an e-mail listserve together, the kind where all our messages were seen by the whole group. Two of the women wer read more..

24 Jul

Clean Jokes

Pastor Tim

2870

Answering Machine Messages

*Answering Machine Messages*Hi. This is John: If you are the phone company, I already sent the money. If you are my parents, please send money. If you are my Financial aid institution, you didn't lend read more..

23 Jul

Clean Jokes

Pastor Tim

4254

Airport Mistletoe

It was the beginning of December. The trip had gone reasonably well, and he was ready to go back. The airport on the other hand had turned a tacky red and green, and loudspeakers blared an... read more..

23 Jul

Peggie's Den

Pastor Tim

4231

God Loves People!

A Hurting Word... "People" are a wonderful part of our lives--sometimes; other times, they're just a big pain! Ever been there? (Maybe YOU'RE the pain--eeks!) But let's be honest--you're a "people p... read more..

23 Jul

Clean Jokes

Pastor Tim

3062

Murphy's Laws on Computers

*Murphy's Laws on Computers*- As soon as you delete a worthless file, you'll need it.- Installing a new program will always mess up at least one old one.- You can't win them all, but you sure can lose read more..

22 Jul

Testimonies

Joshua Goodling

7372

It's Been A Long Week

{mosimage}38 years ago, at approximately 11:00 a. m., on February 4, 1966, as the cold wind blew snow flurries around the Chicago area, a new life came into the world. I was the second of seven childr... read more..

22 Jul

Clean Jokes

Pastor Tim

2797

Goober Catch

If you are wondering what a Goober is, there is a picture of one at:https://www.cybersalt.org/pastor-tim-s-cleanlaugh-site/what-is-a-gooberTwo goobers go on a fishing trip. They rent all the equipmen... read more..

21 Jul

Barb's Mantle

Barbara Sanders

3957

The Solid Rock

https://www.cybersalt.org Almost everyone is familiar with the term "having a millstone around your neck". Life and it's miseries, worries, and frustrations sometimes make you feel that a weight is h... read more..

20 Jul

Clean Jokes

Pastor Tim

4723

Space Pen

During the space race of the 60's, NASA decided that they needed a ball point pen that would write in conditions of zero gravity.After much research and development the "Astronaut Pen" w... read more..

20 Jul

Melva's Devotions

Melva Cooper

3647

Our Protector

"Love the Lord, all you faithful ones! For theLord protects those who are loyal to Him."Psalm 31:23 (NLT) We prayed for the safety of our youth while they would be traveling many miles on a mission t read more..

19 Jul

Dr. Harold McNabb

3747

Give Us Ears

At our session this past week I opened the meeting by reading the same passage from Amos that was read for us this morning. At the conclusion of my reading, one of your elders said in humor, "I am rea... read more..

19 Jul

Clean Jokes

Pastor Tim

2981

Goober Nails

If you are wondering what a Goober is, there is a picture of one at:https://www.cybersalt.org/pastor-tim-s-cleanlaugh-site/what-is-a-gooberTwo goober were working on a house. The one who was nailing ... read more..

18 Jul

Clean Jokes

Pastor Tim

5131

Rich Guy

One day a rich man drives pass a open field and he sees a guy standing there eating grass that was about 2 inches long. The rich man stopped the car and asked the guy why he was eating grass. T... read more..

18 Jul

Joshua Goodling

4708

This Is Christianity

Mark Twain is quoted as saying; "If Christ were here now there is one thing he would not be - a Christian." The sad truth is the way many people who claim to be Christians today live their lives, Mr. ... read more..

18 Jul

Clean Jokes

Pastor Tim

2790

Boss Prepared

As salesman was assigned to secure an important client but failed in his mission.He faxed his secretary and asked her to break the news indirectly to his boss. His note read, "Failed in securing clien... read more..

17 Jul

The Spur

Marcia Lee Laycock

3154

A Depressing Reality?

{mosimage}"What is your life? You are a mist that appears for a little while and then vanishes." (James 4:14b) I don't know about you, but when I read that verse, I thought, how true and how depres read more..

16 Jul

Peggie's Den

Pastor Tim

3727

THROUGH....the Valley!

A Hurting Word... So what's a valley? Here's three possibilities: "Red River Valley" - "Valley of the Dolls" - "Valley of the Jolly Green Giant" (Beware! Recognition of these titles "may" reveal you... read more..

15 Jul

Barb's Mantle

Barbara Sanders

3789

Time of Rest

Have you ever had a week that was so overwhelming that it made you physically tired? You just felt so drained and out of sorts that you were unable to function. Function to me means being able to type... read more..

15 Jul

Clean Jokes

Pastor Tim

2696

Advertising Terms Explained

*Advertising Terms Explained*NEW - Different color from previous design.ALL NEW - Parts are not interchangeable with previous design.EXCLUSIVE - Imported product.UNMATCHED - Almost as good as the comp read more..

14 Jul

Hall of Flames

Pastor Tim

7028

Missed Vulgarity - Some Were Not Amused

On July 14, 2004, I missed a vulgar word in the PearlyGates item I sent out. To apologize and clarify, I sent out the following note (be aware that the missed word appears in print twice below). Pas... read more..

14 Jul

Clean Jokes

Pastor Tim

2827

Lawyer Light Bulb Completion

So many of you threatened to sue me if I didn't supply the end of yesterday's CleanLaugh, (which I think went to the same place that socks go to when they disappear from the dryer) that I thought I ha... read more..

13 Jul

Clean Jokes

Pastor Tim

4646

Slow-Driving Grandma

Sitting on the side of the highway waiting to catch speeding drivers, a State Police Officer sees a car puttering along at 22 MPH. He thinks to himself, "This driver is just as dangerous as a speeder... read more..