2005 - Monthly Archive - Results from #180

17 Oct

Clean Jokes

Pastor Tim

4054

Parrot Problems

A lady was walking down the street to work and she saw a parrot on a perch in front of a pet store. The parrot said to her, "Hey lady, you are really ugly." The lady is furious! She storm... read more..

17 Oct

Clean Jokes

Pastor Tim

3017

Home Donations

A tired homemaker opened the front door of her home to find a young minister from the neighborhood who said, "I'm collecting donations for the new children's home we're building. I hope you'll give wh... read more..

16 Oct

Clean Jokes

Pastor Tim

3941

Evil Brothers

There were two evil brothers. They were rich and used their money to keep their ways from the public eye. They even attended the same church and looked to be perfect Christians. Then, the... read more..

16 Oct

Wonders of Creation

3431

Wonders of Creation - Gecko Feet

How does a gecko manage to walk on a ceiling, or across a sheet of smooth plastic? Do they have tiny hooks on their feet? No. Do they use small suction caps? No. Do they squirt something sticky from t... read more..

15 Oct

Clean Jokes

Pastor Tim

4018

Automobile Acronyms

AUDIAccelerates Under Demonic InfluenceAlways Unsafe Designs Implemented BMWBeautiful Mechanical WonderBig Money WorksBrutal Money Waster BUICKBig Ugly Indestructible Car Killer CHEVROLETCan Hear E... read more..

On Being The Husband Of The Pastor's Wife

15 Oct

God's Penman

Rev. James L. Snyder

4206

On Being The Husband Of The Pastor's Wife

Every job is important to someone, but many jobs do not get the recognition they deserve. One such job is the husband of the pastor's wife. This job carries great responsibility and yet has little if ... read more..

15 Oct

Clean Jokes

Pastor Tim

2484

How To Photograph A New Puppy

1. Remove film from box and load camera.2. Remove film box from puppy's mouth and throw in trash.3. Remove puppy from trash and brush coffee grounds from muzzle.4. Choose a suitable background for pho read more..

15 Oct

Peggie's Den

Peggie Bohanon

3681

Earthquakes of The Heart

It is October 2005, months after the tsunami - we listen with deep sadness to accounts of the earthquake devastation on the Pakistan/India border. Our hearts break as we hear tales of horror--children... read more..

14 Oct

Clean Jokes

Pastor Tim

3835

Work P-p-p-p-p-roblem

A really huge muscular guy with a bad stutter goes to a counter in a department store and asks, "W-w-w-where`s the m-m-m-men`s dep-p-p-partment?" The clerk behind the counter just looks at him and sa... read more..

14 Oct

Clean Jokes

Pastor Tim

2751

Sibling Takes

As I was dropping my son off at daycare the other day, I overheard some of the children talking about their siblings."My brother takes karate lessons," bragged one."My sister takes gymnastics," said a... read more..

14 Oct

Barb's Mantle

Barbara Sanders

4595

On The Road To Recovery

Many of us face troubles throughout our lives. We are met with debts we cannot pay, family problems we cannot solve, sickness we sometimes cannot overcome, or prayers that seem never to be answered. W... read more..

13 Oct

Clean Jokes

Pastor Tim

4378

Two by Fours

Man injured by fallen raccoon A couple of goobers in a pickup truck drove into a lumberyard. One goober walked in the office and said, "We need some four-by-twos." The clerk said, "You mean t... read more..

13 Oct

Clean Jokes

Pastor Tim

2831

Mess Cake

The Chaplain had been assigned to the ship and he noticed how much grief the cooks (Mess Specialists) caught from the crew and how they gave back as much as they got. He talked to the Food Service Off... read more..

13 Oct

Wonders of Creation

3380

Wonders of Creation - Living in Space

At present our planet has an orbiting space station, in which people have been living, sometimes continuously for many months. They have, of course, been tested, to see what the effects of livin... read more..

12 Oct

Clean Jokes

Pastor Tim

3963

'Coons From Heaven

MILLEDGEVILLE, Ga. (AP) - Brad Davis was training his puppy to pick up the scent of a treed raccoon when his colleague, Donnie Lamb, decided to shoot the raccoon out of the tree. Trouble w... read more..

12 Oct

Clean Jokes

Pastor Tim

3048

Resume Examples

These are real examples from real resumes:*Reasons For Leaving Last Job*- Responsibility makes me nervous.- They insisted that all employees get to work by 8:45 every morning. Couldn't work under thos... read more..

Winking, Wiggling and the Power of Words

11 Oct

Guest Authors

Pastor Tim

5735

Winking, Wiggling and the Power of Words

What do "Bewitched", "I Dream of Jeannie" and Genesis 1:1 have in common? Quite a lot! I got this crazy picture in my mind the other day. I don't even know what causes these thoughts to come to mind ... read more..

11 Oct

Clean Jokes

Pastor Tim

3523

3 eggs - 50 years

A newly ordained preacher and his young wife were talking about being more considerate of each other. The good wife promised that she would stop being so critical of his sleep- inducing sermons.... read more..

11 Oct

Clean Jokes

Pastor Tim

4100

Old Goats

A group of Americans were traveling by tour bus through Holland. As they stopped at a cheese farm, a young guide led them through the process of cheese making, explaining that goat's milk was used. Sh... read more..

10 Oct

Guest Authors

Pastor Tim

6552

5 Ways God Answers Prayer

Over the years, I've discovered from Scripture and experience that God loves to answer our prayers. Here are five of his most frequent answers:1. "No, I love you too much." The Lord of the universe is... read more..

10 Oct

Clean Jokes

Pastor Tim

4405

Millionaire's Driver

Millionaire: What's your name, driver? Driver: Alfred, sir. Millionaire: I always call my drivers by their last names. Driver: It's Sweetheart, sir. Millionaire: Drive on, Alfred... read more..

10 Oct

Clean Jokes

Pastor Tim

2908

Happy Birthday Call

A couple phoned a neighbor to extend birthday greetings. They dialed the number and then sang "Happy Birthday" to him. But when they finished their off-key rendition, they discovered that they had di... read more..

09 Oct

Wonders of Creation

3024

Wonders of Creation - Cells

The usual school textbook diagram of a human cell and pictures of the Earth from space share something in common ? both make an object of incredible complexity appear simple. Zoom in on either, and a ... read more..

09 Oct

Clean Jokes

Pastor Tim

4590

The Gift

A guy bought his wife a beautiful diamond ring for her birthday. A friend of his said, "I thought she wanted one of those pretty 4-Wheel drive vehicles." "She did," he replied, "But where in th... read more..

Thanksgiving: The Antidote to Pernicious Creeping Materialism

08 Oct

Dr. Harold McNabb

3812

Thanksgiving: The Antidote to Pernicious Creeping Materialism

One of them, when he saw he was healed, came back, praising God in a loud voice. He threw himself at Jesus? feet and thanked him?and he was a Samaritan. Jesus asked, ?Were not all ten cleansed? Where ... read more..

08 Oct

Clean Jokes

Pastor Tim

3641

Camping Hints

When using a public campground, a tuba placed on your picnic table will keep the campsites on either side vacant. Get even with a bear who raided your food bag by kicking his favorite stump apart and... read more..

08 Oct

Clean Jokes

Pastor Tim

6585

Class Reunions

Every ten years, as summertime nears,An announcement arrives in the mail,A reunion is planned; it'll be really grand;Make plans to attend without fail.I'll never forget the first time we met;We tried ... read more..

07 Oct

Clean Jokes

Pastor Tim

3841

That's the Way . . .

Start with a cage containing five apes. In the cage, hang a banana on a string and put stairs under it. Before long, an ape will go to the stairs and start to climb towards the banana. As soon as he ... read more..

07 Oct

Clean Jokes

Pastor Tim

2945

Brick Order

A man goes into his local building supply store and orders 10,000 bricks."May I ask what you're building?" asks the man behind the counter."It's going to be a barbecue.""Wow, that's a lot of bricks fo... read more..

06 Oct

Clean Jokes

Pastor Tim

4286

Vet's Guarantee

There was once an aspiring veterinarian who put himself through veterinary school working nights as a taxidermist. Upon graduation, he decided he could combine his two vocations to better serve the n... read more..