2005 - Monthly Archive - Results from #750

02 Apr

Clean Jokes

Pastor Tim

4754

Talking Clock

While proudly showing off his new apartment to friends, a college student led the way into the den. "What is the big brass gong and hammer for?" one of his friends asked. "That is the talking clock"... read more..

02 Apr

Clean Jokes

Pastor Tim

2743

Raise Plea

The basketball coach stormed into the university president's office and demanded a raise right then and there. "Please," protested the college President, "you already make more than the entire Histor... read more..

30 Mar

Clean Jokes

Pastor Tim

4787

Miscellaneous Goobers

GOOBERS AT WORK - I was signing the receipt for my credit card purchase when the clerk noticed that I had never signed my name on the back of the credit card. She informed me that she could not ... read more..

30 Mar

The Spur

Marcia Lee Laycock

3505

Half Way Measures and Rolling Stones

Since I moved to Alberta I have been continually aware of the similarities between farmers and miners. They work equally hard, often don't get paid, but would never want to be doing anything else. T read more..

29 Mar

Clean Jokes

Pastor Tim

4900

More Sayings

Blessed are those who hunger and thirst, for they are sticking to their diets. Life is an endless struggle full of frustrations and challenges, but eventually you find a hairstylist you like. You' read more..

29 Mar

Melva's Devotions

Melva Cooper

4863

The Pear Trees

The sun is shining brightly. Soft, gentle winds are blowing through the trees. Tulips are popping out in brilliant reds and yellows. It is a lovely world we live in! I drive down a street near our hou... read more..

How do I get permission to use a joke on the Cleanlaugh site?

29 Mar

Pastor Tim's CleanLaugh Site

Pastor Tim

3985

How do I get permission to use a joke on the Cleanlaugh site?

The jokes I use on the CleanLaugh site are, for the most part, floating around on the net, source unknown. For that reason, I can neither give nor deny permission to use them. That decisio... read more..

28 Mar

Clean Jokes

Pastor Tim

3574

Muffin Moving

After living in our house for four years, we were moving out of state. My husband had backed the truck up to our garage door so that we could start loading all of the boxes. Just then one of our nei... read more..

27 Mar

Clean Jokes

Pastor Tim

27424

Bricklayer's Insurance Claim

I am writing in response to your request for additional information. In block number three of the accident reporting form, I put "poor planning" as the cause of my accident. You said in yo... read more..

27 Mar

Dr. Harold McNabb

3762

Sunday's Coming

Passion week has names for many of the days we celebrate: Maundy Thursday, Good Friday, Easter Sunday, but Saturday has no special name. It's called Holy Saturday, but I think it should have its own n... read more..

26 Mar

Clean Jokes

Pastor Tim

7206

Three Expectant Fathers

Three expectant fathers were in the waiting room. The nurse came out of the delivery room and announced to one of the fathers that he was the father of twins. He was delighted and said what a c... read more..

He Is Risen, Indeed Sir, Glory-Hallelujah-Amen.

26 Mar

God's Penman

Rev. James L. Snyder

4807

He Is Risen, Indeed Sir, Glory-Hallelujah-Amen.

As a young person growing up in the church, I was familiar with Easter. I heard all the Bible stories and knew them by heart. I understood this was a special time of the year for all Christians. The E... read more..

26 Mar

Clean Jokes

Pastor Tim

3159

Geneology Question

When my granddaughter, Ann, was 9-years-old, she was given an assignment by her teacher to write a story on "Where my family came from." The purpose was to understand your genealogy.I was not aware of... read more..

26 Mar

The Spur

Marcia Lee Laycock

3709

A Bad Day And The Day After

My dog died yesterday. We got a call from the vet that she'd been hit by a car. She was still alive when we got there and we had to decide whether or not to try and keep her that way. She was an old d... read more..

25 Mar

Clean Jokes

Pastor Tim

2921

Honeymoon In England

On a visit to my wife's native England for our honeymoon, we arrived at London's Gatwick Airport.Tania headed for the British passport control line while I, an American, waited in the foreigners' line... read more..

24 Mar

Barb's Mantle

Barbara Sanders

3824

A Call For Death

This entire week, the television has been swamped with news about the Terri Schiavo case. This is a woman who has lived for fifteen years with a feeding tube, but nothing else to keep her alive. A fee... read more..

23 Mar

Melva's Devotions

Melva Cooper

5331

Carl Edwards - Two Days, Two Wins

Two wins in two days means two backflips from NASCAR's new star Carl Edwards. A few NASCAR drivers before him have taken on the grueling task of driving in both the Busch and Cup Series. But none can ... read more..

23 Mar

Clean Jokes

Pastor Tim

5594

Reasons Not To Wash

If you took the same excuses that people use for not going to church and apply them to other important areas of life you'd realize how inconsistent we can be in our logic. For example: Reasons... read more..

23 Mar

Clean Jokes

Pastor Tim

2632

4 Year Ceiling

A young woman, pursuing a graduate degree in art history, was going to Italy to study the country's greatest works of art. Since there was no one to look after her grandmother while she was away, she ... read more..

22 Mar

Clean Jokes

Pastor Tim

4188

30 Minutes To A Cleaner House

*30 Minutes To A Cleaner House* You're getting company in 30 minutes. Your house is a mess. WHAT WILL YOU DO? Welcome, ladies and gentlemen, to the first session of Housekeeping Tips for Regular Peo read more..

22 Mar

Peggie's Den

Peggie Bohanon

4978

A Holy Week Crime...Murder in Minnesota

Come with me to the Holy Week events as our Lord suffered and died that He might redeem mankind--including the high school teen whose reign of terror resulted in the murder of 9 persons, along with ot... read more..

22 Mar

Clean Jokes

Pastor Tim

3009

Dog Errand

A butcher is working, and really busy. He notices a dog in his shop and shoos him away. Later, he notices the dog is back again.He walks over to the dog, and notices the dog has a note in his mouth.... read more..

21 Mar

Clean Jokes

Pastor Tim

5132

Reading At Lunchtime

A Jewish man took his Passover lunch to eat outside in the park. He sat down on a bench and began eating. Since Jews do not eat leavened bread during the eight day holiday, he was eating M... read more..

21 Mar

Dr. Harold McNabb

3991

Jesus Is Pure Gold

One thing I have learned over the last while from Valerie is to be a better tipper. Not that I was cheap or anything, but I would leave a ten percent tip and figured that was enough. I have seen the l... read more..

21 Mar

Clean Jokes

Pastor Tim

2948

Company Motivation Posters

*Company Motivation Posters You Will Never See*1) If you do a good job and work hard, you may get a job with a better company someday.2) It's only unethical if you get caught.3) The light at the end o read more..

How To Cash In On Your ?Ailment Capital'

20 Mar

God's Penman

Rev. James L. Snyder

4420

How To Cash In On Your ?Ailment Capital'

Right after the president won his re-election bid for the White House, he made an interesting comment. He said he was going to spend his "political capital" wisely. At first, I did not understand wh... read more..

20 Mar

Clean Jokes

Pastor Tim

9331

Diaper Change

"Here's your problem," says the doctor to the first-time father. "This baby's in serious need of a diaper change." Looking baffled, the man replies, "But the package says it's good for 8 to 10 pound read more..

20 Mar

Clean Jokes

Pastor Tim

3461

Young Guy's "BG"

At Andersen Air Force Base, Guam, a man in civilian clothes approached an airman and requested a vehicle pass. The young airman, fresh out of technical training, asked to see his military ID, driver's... read more..

19 Mar

Clean Jokes

Pastor Tim

4484

One-liners

*43.3% of statistics are meaningless! *Circular Definition: see Definition, Circular. *A.A.A.A.A. - An organization for drunks who drive. *It said 'Insert disk #3', but only two will fit. *Which i read more..

19 Mar

Guest Authors

Pastor Tim

6948

One Man's Death--Every Man's Guarantee

We all keep hoping for peace. World War I was "the war to end all wars." Then we found ourselves in the midst of World War II-again sending out sons, husbands, and fathers who may not return.The wars ... read more..