January 2006 - Monthly Archive

20 Jan

Clean Jokes

Pastor Tim

2790

Market Conditions

The stockbroker's secretary answered his phone one morning. "I'm sorry," she said, "Mr. Bradford's on another line.""This is Mr. Ingram's office," the caller said. "We'd like to know if he's bullish o... read more..

19 Jan

Clean Jokes

Pastor Tim

4199

Does Your Dog Bite?

A man was standing on the curb reading a newspaper, A great big dog was curled up at his feet. Another man came up and inquired, "Does your dog bite?" No replied the man with the paper The othe... read more..

19 Jan

Clean Jokes

Pastor Tim

2674

Golf Discovery

A wife was getting tired of her husband golfing every Saturday, so she decided to go with him to see what the attraction was.His first drive of the day went into the rough, then his second shot bounc... read more..

18 Jan

Peggie's Den

Peggie Bohanon

3733

Time and Space

Now I'm not a rocket scientist and have no clue to the inner workings of science--I leave that to my husband, an organic chemistry professor--who can have your brain spinning as he lectures on the eno... read more..

18 Jan

Clean Jokes

Pastor Tim

3338

Interesting thoughts

It is hard to understand how a cemetery raised its burial cost and blamed it on the cost of living. Just remember...if the world didn't suck, we'd all fall off. We are born naked, wet, and hungry. T... read more..

18 Jan

Clean Jokes

Pastor Tim

3064

What's it Take?

"What do you have to do to become a doctor?" my six-year-old granddaughter once asked.Her dad, seeing an opportunity, said, "You have to do extremely well in school, take a lot of math and science, ge read more..

17 Jan

Wonders of Creation

4141

Wonders of Creation - Small Organism

There are many examples in Nature, of large organisms needing very small organisms to survive. Whales need krill, for example; yucca plants need the tiny grubs of yucca moths. Some spiny trees need an... read more..

17 Jan

Clean Jokes

Pastor Tim

3970

Frugal - to save

Mary's fourth grade homework assignment was to make sentences using the words in her spelling list, along with the definition. Coming across the word "frugal" in the list, she asked her father w... read more..

17 Jan

Clean Jokes

Pastor Tim

2932

Notice

PLEASE NOTICE:You may have noticed the increased amount of notices for you to notice. Some of our notices have not been noticed. This is very noticeable. It has been noticed that the responses to the ... read more..

A Red Purse, an Orange Sweater and a Light that Must Shine

17 Jan

The Spur

Marcia Lee Laycock

4214

A Red Purse, an Orange Sweater and a Light that Must Shine

I recently read an article that was all about buying a red purse. No, it wasn't in a fashion magazine. The woman described how, as she bought it, she ridiculed herself ? ?You?ll never have the courage... read more..

16 Jan

Clean Jokes

Pastor Tim

4321

Screaming patient

A woman went to doctors the office. She was seen by one of the new doctors, but after about 4 minutes in the examination room, she burst out, screaming as she ran down the hall. An older d... read more..

16 Jan

Clean Jokes

Pastor Tim

3161

Boat Rental

A Scotsman, planning a trip to the Holy Land, was aghast when he found it would cost fifty dollars an hour to rent a boat on the Sea of Galilee. "Hoot mon," he said, "in Scotland it wouldna ha been mo... read more..

15 Jan

Clean Jokes

Pastor Tim

4400

Grandpa's Day Out

Grandpa's Day Out A police car pulls up in front of grandma Bessie's house, and grandpa Morris gets out. The polite policeman explained that this elderly gentleman said that he was lost in the park... read more..

15 Jan

Dr. Harold McNabb

4650

Jesus Says, "Follow Me"

On Pentecost island in Vanuatu, there used to be a coming of age ritual similar to bungee jumping. In fact this is where bungee jumping originated. The elders built a tower from bamboo poles; and then... read more..

15 Jan

Sermons

Pastor Tim

3308

The Listening Church

Listen to this message to see how a church can hear God's voice and learn what His will is for them both as individuals and as a congregation. Listen Online: {audio}podcast/sm20060115.... read more..

Early To Bed, Early To Rise, Makes A Man Want To Cry

14 Jan

God's Penman

Rev. James L. Snyder

5705

Early To Bed, Early To Rise, Makes A Man Want To Cry

Any real accomplishment in life begins with a well-laid plan. My plans for Thursday were so well laid I had difficulty getting out of bed. However, this did not in the least bit worry me. For the las read more..

14 Jan

Clean Jokes

Pastor Tim

5256

Hmmmm... Ham Sandwich

As ham sandwiches go, it was perfection. A thick slab of ham, a fresh bun, crisp lettuce and plenty of expensive, light brown, gourmet mustard. The corners of my jaw aching in anticipation... read more..

13 Jan

Joshua Goodling

5167

Taking Christ Out Of Christianity

I've become quite fed up with a lot of people who claim to be Christians lately. It seems they want to force "Christianity" upon everyone in the world, and yet at the same time they themselves don't w... read more..

13 Jan

Clean Jokes

Pastor Tim

5625

Here Kitty

Once there was a man named Jim, who let his dog out to pee late one night.He watched some TV, and then remembered to let the dog back in. When he opened the door, he was shocked at what he saw!&... read more..

13 Jan

Clean Jokes

Pastor Tim

3010

Apology Letter

Lisa, my co-worker at the travel agency, needed to send a letter of apology to a customer whose trip was a complete fiasco from start to finish. I reminded her of a similar situation a year earlier an... read more..

12 Jan

Clean Jokes

Pastor Tim

4075

Goober Medical Terms

enign.......................What you be after you be eight.Artery.........................The study of paintings.Bacteria.....................Back door to cafeteria.Barium.......................What d... read more..

11 Jan

Guest Authors

Pastor Tim

7032

Peace At Last

West Berlin, December, 1966. Cold and unknown, I strolled through the wintery city, bundled in my overcoat, determined to reach the border. Standing at the edge of West Berlin, I shuddered, pondering ... read more..

11 Jan

Clean Jokes

Pastor Tim

3927

Art Collector

A famous art collector is walking through the city when he notices a mangy cat lapping milk from a saucer in the doorway of a store and he does a double take. He knows that the saucer is extremely ol... read more..

11 Jan

Clean Jokes

Pastor Tim

2673

License Picture

A traffic cop stopped a woman for a minor traffic violation. After examining her driver's license in silence for a moment, he said, "You know something? This is one of the finest, most realistic pictu... read more..

10 Jan

Clean Jokes

Pastor Tim

3830

Potential Company Mergers

Xerox and Wurlitzer: They're going to make reproductive organs Fairchild Electronics and Honeywell Computers: New company will be called Fairwell Honeychild Polygram records, Warner Brothers and Kee... read more..

10 Jan

The Spur

Marcia Lee Laycock

4984

Tarnished Mirrors

It was very early on a Saturday morning and I could hear my sister, Leisha, already rattling around in the kitchen, making coffee. By the time I got downstairs she was pouring the hot liquid into a th... read more..

10 Jan

Clean Jokes

Pastor Tim

2681

Bad Day Sign

You know it's going to be a bad day when your teenager knocks on your bedroom door first thing in the morning and says,"Today is Nerd Day at school, Pop. Can I borrow some of your clothes?"... read more..

09 Jan

Wonders of Creation

3823

Wonders of Creation - Life Instead of Euthanasia

The movie 'million Dollar Baby? is, in many ways, a wonderful piece of drama, well acted, and well presented, and also a tribute to the skills of its director, but its message is dismal. A female boxe... read more..

09 Jan

Clean Jokes

Pastor Tim

4541

Sisters at the Superbowl

Two elderly sisters donated $25 to a charity and, to their surprise, won tickets to the Superbowl. Since they had never seen a live football game before, Madge thought the free tickets would pro... read more..

09 Jan

Clean Jokes

Pastor Tim

2825

Job Search Jargon

Whether you are a student looking for that first time or summer job or a long-time veteran looking for a change of pace, this JOB SEARCH JARGON should help you get on your way...COMPETITIVE SALARY:We ... read more..