2007 - Monthly Archive - Results from #480

14 Apr

Clean Jokes

Pastor Tim

2791

Sermon Follow-Up

A minister told his congregation, "Next week I plan to preach about the sin of lying. To help you understand my sermon, I want you all to read Mark 17."The following Sunday, as he prepared to deliver ... read more..

13 Apr

Clean Jokes

Pastor Tim

4772

Shopping On Up

In a upscale department store, every night at closing time one of our customer-service representatives reminds shoppers over the public address system to finish their shopping. One evening, a w read more..

13 Apr

Clean Jokes

Pastor Tim

2914

Accident Prayer

As my five-year-old-son and I were headed to McDonald's one day, we passed a car accident.Usually when we see something terrible like that, we say a prayer for those who might be hurt, so I pointed an... read more..

12 Apr

Clean Jokes

Pastor Tim

12931

Red Light - Green Light

Ralph and his friend were driving through town when they came to a red light. Cruising through the red light, Ralph's friend expressed concern. "Don't worry," Ralph said read more..

12 Apr

Clean Jokes

Pastor Tim

3147

Rewiring

Because our former small-town parish was not a wealthy one, our pastor was dependent on parishioners for upkeep and maintenance of the church.Once he asked my husband, Sam, to rewire the confessionals... read more..

11 Apr

Clean Jokes

Pastor Tim

5248

Car Trip

Friends took their first-grader on a car trip to Canada. To help pass the time, the boy practiced his new reading skills by calling out road signs. He fell asleep just before they e read more..

11 Apr

Shirley Choat

3048

Good Morning 04-12

"And their words seemed to them as idle tales, and they believed them not." - Luke 24:11 What crowds filled our churches last Sunday. If only we could be sure that all believed read more..

11 Apr

FunBlog

Pastor Tim

2466

Fish Feeder

Is it a fish pond or a duck pond? Either way, these are the perfect pets for your kids - that way you don't have to worry about ending up feeding them when they lose interest. Ok, yo read more..

11 Apr

FunBlog

Pastor Tim

2295

Scuba Cat

Call me a pessimist, but I think a scuba diving cat only has one idea - finally conquering your salt water aquarium and eating your tropical fish. ... read more..

11 Apr

FunBlog

Pastor Tim

2544

Holding Hands

I know that a lot of you are against keeping animals in zoos, but how else can animals safely observe humans? Think about it. Animals in the wild would never get the chance to view some of our read more..

11 Apr

Shirley Choat

2401

Good Morning 04-11

CHRIST IS RISEN-HE IS RISEN INDEED-ALLELUIA! "Then they told what had happened on the road, and how He was known to them in the breaking of the bread." - Luke 24:13-35 Two of read more..

10 Apr

Clean Jokes

Pastor Tim

4656

Dear Marty

Dear Marty, I have been unable to sleep since I broke off your engagement to my daughter. Will you forgive and forget? I was much too sensitive about your Mohawk, tattoo and pierced read more..

09 Apr

Clean Jokes

Pastor Tim

9903

Word Impatience

Our five-year-old son went to a church conference with my wife and me. He got restless, so my wife handed him a pad and pencil and suggested he mark down every time the speaker said the read more..

09 Apr

Shirley Choat

2188

Good Morning 04-10

Christ is risen, He is risen indeed, Alleluia "Jesus met them and said, "Hail" and they came up and took hold of His feet and worshiped Him." - Matthew 28:9 Ch read more..

09 Apr

Shirley Choat

2301

Good Morning 04-09

"Because I live, you will live also." - John 14:19 The miracle of Easter celebrated yesterday by Christians throughout the world is the recognition that we are alive. Amid all t read more..

09 Apr

FunBlog

Pastor Tim

2136

Flower Garden

Regardless of what season it is where you are, here are some flowers for you to enjoy. You just have to click your mouse and they'll sprout. Now you can have a spring or fall garden anytime you want... read more..

08 Apr

Clean Jokes

Pastor Tim

5265

Prison Riot

The warden, addressing the three instigators of a failed prison riot, said, "I would like to know two things. First: Why did you revolt? Second: How did you get out of your cell?&qu read more..

08 Apr

Clean Jokes

Pastor Tim

3470

Hand Dryers

My pastor friend put sanitary hot air hand dryers in the rest rooms at his church and after two weeks took them out.I asked him why and he confessed that they worked fine but when he went in there he ... read more..

08 Apr

Shirley Choat

2166

Good Morning 04-08

CHRIST IS RISEN - His Risen Indeed - ALLELUIA - The moon is pale in the western sky,the air is thick and gray, to the east there are faint, but telling signs of the drawning read more..

08 Apr

Christmas

Pastor Tim

3501

What has Happened to Your Joy?

Sometimes we reach a point in life when we just need to stop and ask ourselves where our Joy went - if we ever had it all. Listen Online: {audio}podcast/sm20070408.mp3{/audio}... read more..

07 Apr

Clean Jokes

Pastor Tim

4734

Cultural Ages

A Hebrew teacher stood in front of his class and said, "The Jewish people have observed their 5,759th year as a people. Consider that the Chinese, for example, have only observed their 4, read more..

06 Apr

Shirley Choat

2073

Good Morning 04-07

"The next day, the one after Preparation Day, the chief priests and the Pharisees went to Pilate and said, "We remember that while He was still alive that deceiver said,' After three read more..

06 Apr

Clean Jokes

Pastor Tim

4498

English Time

In my English-as-a-second-language class, I explained the difference between a watch and a clock. I told the students that when it was a large timepiece on a wall and not attached to you read more..

05 Apr

Peggie's Den

Peggie Bohanon

3600

T.G.I.F.

T.G.I.F. (Easter version - to be read on Good Friday) "T.G.I.F.," under normal circumstances, means "Thank God, it's Friday!" - we smile, relax and look forward to a much read more..

05 Apr

Shirley Choat

2200

Good Morning 04-06

GOOD FRIDAY "When they were come to the place, which is called Calvary, there they crucified Him." - Luke 23,33 Tonight we go to Golgotha to see with our own eyes read more..

05 Apr

FunBlog

Pastor Tim

2598

Japanese Pac-Man

Once again, my current language skills prevent me from previewing this clip to make sure it's appropriate language-wise. So if you speak Japanese, I'll let you assume the risk of liste read more..

05 Apr

Shirley Choat

2388

Good Morning 04-05

MAUNDY THURSDAY "Ye shall say unto the goodman of the house, The Master saith unto thee, "Where is the guestchamber, where I shall eat the passover with My disciples? And He sha read more..

04 Apr

Clean Jokes

Pastor Tim

4320

Call to Principal

The telephone rings in the principal's office at a school. "Hello, this is Dunn Elementary," answers the principal. "Hi. Jimmy won't be able to come to school all n read more..

04 Apr

Clean Jokes

Pastor Tim

2801

Tired Son

A clergyman, walking down a country lane, sees a young farmer struggling to load hay back onto a cart after it had fallen off."You look tired, my son," said the cleric. "Why don't you rest a moment, a... read more..

04 Apr

FunBlog

Pastor Tim

2340

Upside Down Typing

OK, so you sent your friend randomly generated text and they are really angry that you wasted so much of their time. Why not send them a note of apology - only type it upside down. The read more..