Monthly Archive

"In Congress someone gets up to speak and says nothing, nobody listens, and then they all disagree." read more..

"In light of the economic crisis, My family extending the 5 second rule for dropped food to 10 seconds, especially in the case of blueberries."- Rick Griffin read more..

"In order to keep a true perspective of one's importance, everyone should have a dog that will worship him and a cat that will ignore him." read more..

"In this crazy world we live in, every 60 seconds a minute happens." read more..

"Irony: God made the tortoise with a 0.3 drag co-efficient." read more..

"It could be worse: there could be 35 teachers for every student." read more..

"It doesn't matter whether you win or lose, until you lose." read more..

"It goes without saying that you should never have more children than you have car windows."- Erma Bombeck read more..

"It is bad to suppress laughter; it goes back down and spreads to your hips." read more..

"It is bad to suppress laughter; it goes back down and spreads to your hips." read more..

"It is never wise to let any piece of electronic equipment know that you are in a hurry." read more..

"It sure is easier to get Junior up for school since he got his nose ring." read more..

"It was different when we were kids; in second grade, a teacher came in and gave us all a lecture about not smoking, and then they sent us over to arts and crafts to make ashtrays for Mother's Day."- read more..

"It's a strange world of language in which skating on thin ice can get you into hot water."- Franklin P. Jones read more..

"It's no longer a question of staying healthy - it's a question of finding a sickness you like."~Jackie Mason read more..

"It's no longer a question of staying healthy, it's a question of finding a sickness you like."~Jackie Mason read more..

"It's not a bug - it's just an undocumented feature." read more..

"It's not an optical illusion - it just looks like one." read more..

"It's not me who can't keep a secret it's the people I tell that can't."- Abraham Lincoln read more..

"It's scary when you start making the same noises as your coffeemaker." read more..

"I've been having trouble concentrating lately - I think I have that attention deficit whatever." read more..

"I've spent most of my life golfing - the rest I've just wasted" read more..

"Jesus said we will always have the poor amongst us. Well, here I am."- Juan Ruiz, www.askjuan.net read more..

"Join the AAAAAA! (American Association Against Acronym Abuse Anonymous)" read more..

"Junk is something you've kept for years and throw away three weeks before you need it." read more..

"Kissing - A means of getting two people so close together that they can't see anything wrong with each other." read more..

"Last night I played a blank tape at full blast and the mime next door went nuts." read more..

"Last week, I stated this woman was the ugliest woman I had ever seen. I have since been visited by her sister and now wish to withdraw that statement."- Mark Twain read more..

"Lecturing is transferring information from the notes of the lecturer to the notes of the students without passing through the minds of either." read more..

"Light sabers don't kill people. Jedi Knights kill people." read more..