2011 - Monthly Archive - Results from #1260

04 Aug

Cybersalt News

Pastor Tim

1709

Cybersalt News - August 4, 2011

Oh look, Chicken Thursday! Today's featured page makes one wonder why cameras have red eye reduction but not white eye reduction. You will find "Cat Toy Shock" at: www.cybersalt.org/funny-cat-... read more..

03 Aug

Clean Puns

Pastor Tim

2735

Chickens at the Library

A pair of chickens walk into a public library, find the librarian and say, 'Buk Buk BUK.' The librarian decides that the chickens want three books, and promptly gives them some. Without further ... read more..

03 Aug

Clean Jokes

Pastor Tim

3617

Sheriff Vet

The sheriff of a small town was also the town's veterinarian. One night the phone rang, and his wife answered. An agitated voice inquired, "Is your husband there?" "Do you require his services as a ... read more..

03 Aug

One-liners

Pastor Tim

1537

One-liner #0685

"The probability of meeting someone you know increases when you are with someone you don't want to be seen with." read more..

03 Aug

Quotes

Pastor Tim

1546

Quote #1137

"You do not need a parachute to skydive - you need a parachute to skydive twice." read more..

02 Aug

Cartoons

Jeff Larson

11051

Football Penalties Bible Cartoon

There's Plenty More "The Back Pew" cartoons athttp://www.thebackpew.com read more..

02 Aug

Clean Jokes

Pastor Tim

3621

Professional Animal Trainer

As a professional animal trainer, I was disturbed when my own dog developed a bad habit. Every time I hung my wash out on the clothesline, she would yank it down. Drastic action was called for. I pu... read more..

02 Aug

Clean Puns

Pastor Tim

2183

Clean Pun #0221

Is the Origami Society still around? I heard they folded.... read more..

02 Aug

Quotes

Pastor Tim

1303

Quote #1136

"Love is the difficult realization that something other than oneself is real." - Iris Murdoch read more..

02 Aug

One-liners

Pastor Tim

1541

One-liner #0684

"I dream of a better tomorrow where chickens can cross the road and not have their motives questioned." read more..

02 Aug

Cybersalt News

Pastor Tim

1420

Cybersalt News - August 3, 2011

A few weeks ago a subscriber suggested it would be great to be able to share Cybersalt Digest items online from within the digest itself. The first thought out of my technologically overloaded m... read more..

01 Aug

Clean Puns

Pastor Tim

2207

Cell Phone Charges

My parents recently returned from an extended vacation with their new cell phone. Although they are on a nationwide plan, they did make a brief foray into Canada, so they were hit with some surprise "... read more..

01 Aug

One-liners

Pastor Tim

1786

One-liner #0683

"You don't need a twitter account cause Chuck Norris is already following you." read more..

01 Aug

Clean Jokes

Pastor Tim

7125

Official ID Card

My husband, a U.S. Coast Guard pilot, was on an exchange tour with the Royal Navy in England. Everyone who drove through the base's gates was required to hold an official ID card up to the windshield... read more..

01 Aug

Cybersalt News

Pastor Tim

1470

Cybersalt News - August 2, 2011

As you will have gathered already from the special administrative note I sent out earlier, I have transferred all of the Cybersalt Newsletters to new software that incorporates them within the same so... read more..

31 Jul

Quotes

Pastor Tim

1350

Quote #1135

"It is better to wear out than to rust out." - Bishop Richard Cumberland read more..

31 Jul

Sermons

Marcia Lee Laycock

1183

Your Journey with God

To bring us to the journey God has for us, He instructs, guides, teaches, and confides in us. Each of these things - though sounding the same - are different. Listen Online:{audio}podca... read more..

30 Jul

Clean Jokes

Pastor Tim

3236

Border Declaration

Finishing up our work at a trade show in San Diego, my co-worker Maureen and I decided to go sightseeing across the border in Tijuana, Mexico. While there, we went shopping and bought a few pieces of ... read more..

30 Jul

Clean Jokes

Pastor Tim

4262

Mom's Bath Note

Dear Kids, Don't be alarmed, the world isn't coming to an end. I am simply taking a bath. It will take about thirty minutes and will involve soap and water. Yes, I know how to swim.... read more..

29 Jul

Clean Jokes

Pastor Tim

3362

Shades of Tanning

Before going on vacation, I went to a tanning salon. I was under the lights so long that the protective shades I wore left a big white circle around each eye. Gazing at myself in the mirror the next ... read more..

Assorted Puns Too Painful To Send Individually

29 Jul

Clean Puns

Pastor Tim

1922

Assorted Puns Too Painful To Send Individually

Q. What kind of snack do little monkeys have with their milk?A. Chocolate chimp cookies.Q. What do you get when you cross a pig and a centipede?A. Bacon and legs.Q. What's a cat's favorite breakfast?A... read more..

29 Jul

Clean Puns

Pastor Tim

2530

Baby Name Puns

Baby name ideas, based on your occupation!PROFESSION.................................NAMELawyer's daughter.............................SueThief's son........................................RobLawyer's... read more..

29 Jul

Clean Puns

Pastor Tim

2029

Bear Pun 1

A Russian scientist and a Czechoslovakian scientist had spent their whole lives studying the majestic grizzly bear. Each year they petitioned their respective governments to allow them to go to Yello... read more..

29 Jul

Clean Puns

Pastor Tim

2334

Bear Pun 2

Three men came back from fishing one day, but when they got back to their truck, they saw it was surrounded by three bears. One of the men said, "OK, guys, I figure the only way we're gonna get back ... read more..

29 Jul

Clean Puns

Pastor Tim

1974

Benny's Three Wishes

Benny worked at the Metropolitan Museum of Art. His primary job was to keep the exhibits clean and polished. One day he happened to be dusting around the Arabian exhibit, and he noticed an ancient urn... read more..

29 Jul

Clean Puns

Pastor Tim

2225

Bird Puns

Some of these are pretty bad.What birds spend all their time on their knees?Birds of prey.What do you call a very rude bird?A mockingbird.Where do birds meet for coffee?In a nest-cafe.What do you call... read more..

29 Jul

Clean Puns

Pastor Tim

4618

Borscht

With all the borscht they consume, I don't understand why Russians aren't the world's greatest rock stars. I mean, everyone knows that the heart of rock and roll is the beet.... read more..

29 Jul

Clean Puns

Pastor Tim

3158

Box Pun

On my 15th birthday, I opened a package from my mom and sister. Out came a beauty case containing samples of my very own makeup. "Oh, neat," my dad said excitedly, "a tackle box!" My mother and sist... read more..

29 Jul

Clean Puns

Pastor Tim

2427

Breakdown Pun24

I was driving to work this morning when my car stalled in the damp weather. I was sitting in the car at the side of the highway, contemplating my next move, when a pigeon flew down and landed right i... read more..

29 Jul

Clean Puns

Pastor Tim

2376

Budget

I've been working on my budget. Line one is my fixed expenses, line two is my fixed income and the difference is the fix I'm in.... read more..