Monthly Archive

2011

Welcome to our Archives page. On this page you will find a total of 3444 of our articles broken down into Months and Years.

29 Jul

Clean Puns

Pastor Tim

1994

Free or Not Free

The Fourth of July was coming up, and the nursery school teacher took the opportunity to tell her class about patriotism. "We live in a great country," she said. "One of the things we should be happy ... read more..

29 Jul

Clean Puns

Pastor Tim

3393

Freedom

Memorial Day weekend was coming up, and the nursery school teacher took the opportunity to tell her class about patriotism. "We live in a great country," she said. "One of the things we should be hap... read more..

29 Jul

Clean Puns

Pastor Tim

14240

Frisbee Pun

The other day I was standing in the park wondering why Frisbees get bigger and bigger the closer they get.Then it hit me.... read more..

29 Jul

Clean Puns

Pastor Tim

2832

Frisbees

The other day I was standing in the park wondering why Frisbees get bigger and bigger the closer they get.Then it hit me.... read more..

29 Jul

Clean Puns

Pastor Tim

2360

Frog Pun

Frogs have it easy; they can eat what bugs them.... read more..

29 Jul

Clean Puns

Pastor Tim

2129

Funeral Expenses

A woman's husband died. He had $20,000 to his name. After paying all the funeral expenses, she told her closest friend that there was no money left. The friend asked, "How can that be? You told me he ... read more..

29 Jul

Clean Puns

Pastor Tim

2112

Game Hunt

They have a game hunt each year at the Kennedy compound in Massachusetts. They call it "Hyena sport."~Gary Hallock... read more..

29 Jul

Clean Puns

Pastor Tim

2195

Garden Theft

"Thieves who steal corn from a garden could be charged with stalking." read more..

29 Jul

Clean Puns

Pastor Tim

3600

Garnish Pun

Today's Cleanpun is actually a report to you all on a recent MSN Chat conversation I had with a CleanPun member Texas.It was a delightful chat - especially when I learned the his name was not only who... read more..

29 Jul

Clean Puns

Pastor Tim

2634

Gasr

Saudi Arabia offered to help lower gasoline prices Sunday. It's just in time for the holiday. Americans are about to celebrate Gasover, when an angel stops by the door of every SUV and collects the fi... read more..

29 Jul

Clean Puns

Pastor Tim

3199

Gear Box Pun

A friend of mine tried to build a gear-box for his car using nothing but dried grass. It was never going to work; I think he was clutching at straws.... read more..

29 Jul

Clean Puns

Pastor Tim

2216

General Pun

I was in the band at Ellsworth Air Force Base, South Dakota.Our group was required to play for all generals who arrived on our base. One morning, when our commanding officer heard on the radio that a... read more..

29 Jul

Clean Puns

Pastor Tim

2125

Genius Farmer

A man is driving down a country road when he spots a farmer standing in the middle of a huge field of grass. He pulls the car over to the side of the road and notices that the farmer is just standing... read more..

29 Jul

Clean Puns

Pastor Tim

2897

Gerald the Infamous Reindeer Pun

My brother, a pastor, has done some methodical research and discovered the name of another one of Santa's reindeer - Gerald Lee. Gerald was bigger than the rest of the reindeer, and not too gifted in... read more..

29 Jul

Clean Puns

Pastor Tim

2823

Ghost Marriage

I once knew a woman wanted to marry a ghost.I don't know what possessed her!... read more..

29 Jul

Clean Puns

Pastor Tim

3103

Ghost Pun

An intrepid photographer went to a haunted castle determined to get a picture of a ghost which was said to appear only once in a hundred years.Not wanting to frighten off the ghost, the photographer s... read more..

29 Jul

Clean Puns

Pastor Tim

2004

Gift

"My childhood was rough. Once for my birthday my old man gave me a bat. The first day I played with it, it flew away."- Rodney Dangerfield read more..

29 Jul

Clean Puns

Pastor Tim

2176

Gift Disappointment

The rich aunt was hurt and said to her nephew, "I'm sorry you don't like your gift. I asked you if you preferred a large check or a small check.""I know, Auntie," the nephew said contritely, "but I d... read more..

29 Jul

Clean Puns

Pastor Tim

2094

Gift Pun

The fight between good and evil, an epic battle: Darth Vader and Luke. Suddenly in the middle of the fight, Darth Vader pulls Luke to him, and whispers "I know what you're getting for Christmas!"Luke... read more..

29 Jul

Clean Puns

Pastor Tim

2400

Giuseppe Spomdalucc

To impress his date, the young man took her to a very chic Italian restaurant. After sipping some fine wine, he picked up the menu and ordered. "We'll have the Giuseppe Spomdalucci," he said."Sorry, s... read more..

29 Jul

Clean Puns

Pastor Tim

3958

Gladys Pun

There was this lady who was visiting a church one Sunday. The sermon seemed to go on forever, and many in the congregation fell asleep.After the service, to be social, she walked up to a very sleepy ... read more..

29 Jul

Clean Puns

Pastor Tim

7273

Gland Pun

Little is known about the salivary glands because they are so secretive.... read more..

29 Jul

Clean Puns

Pastor Tim

3763

Glazier

My son is the manager of a glass and window company and advertised in the paper for experienced glaziers. Since a good glass man is hard to find, he was pleased when a man who called about the job sai... read more..

29 Jul

Clean Puns

Pastor Tim

2202

Goat Junk

Two goats wandered into the junkyard and had a field day. One of them spent a particularly long time bent over a spool of film. When he was finished, the other goat came over. "So, did you enjoy the f... read more..

29 Jul

Clean Puns

Pastor Tim

2045

Golden Years

"Ah, the golden years. When actions creak louder than words." read more..

29 Jul

Clean Puns

Pastor Tim

1896

Golf Gun

Two Mexican detectives were investigating the murder of Juan Gonzalez."How was he killed?" asked one detective. "With a golf gun," the other detective replied. "A golf gun?! What is a golf gun?" "I do... read more..

29 Jul

Clean Puns

Pastor Tim

2063

Golf Tomatoes

"I don't want to say my golf game is bad, but if I grew tomatoes they'd come up sliced." read more..

29 Jul

Clean Puns

Pastor Tim

4334

Gone Pun

A bill collector knocked on the door of a country debtor. "Is Fred home?", he asked the woman who answered the door. "Sorry," the woman replied. "Fred's gone for cotton." The next day, the collect... read more..

29 Jul

Clean Puns

Pastor Tim

5590

Gossip

A gossip is someone with a great "sense of rumor."... read more..

29 Jul

Clean Puns

Pastor Tim

1881

Got Everything?

"Two paramedics were dispatched to check on a 92-year-old man who had become disoriented. They decided to take him to the hospital for evaluation.En route, with the siren blaring, they questioned the read more..

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