2011 - Monthly Archive - Results from #1560

29 Jul

Clean Puns

Pastor Tim

5039

Merger Puns

Merger ManiaA number of years ago there was a proposed merger between Fairchild Electronics and Honeywell Computers. Rumor had it that the new company would be called Fairwell Honeychild.There is a me... read more..

29 Jul

Clean Puns

Pastor Tim

2128

Meritrix

Once Horace Gold [my editor] went too far. He rejected a story of mine which he called "meretricious." The word is from the Latin meretrix, meaning "prostitute," so that the implication was that I wa... read more..

29 Jul

Clean Puns

Pastor Tim

2484

Meteorologist

Although he was a qualified meteorologist, Hopkins ran up a terrible record of forecasting the weather for the TV news program.He became something of a local joke when a newspaper began keeping a reco... read more..

29 Jul

Clean Puns

Pastor Tim

1848

Milk

The minister once blessed his cows,It seems that this was wise,For when he milked them in the mornThe milk was pastorized.... read more..

29 Jul

Clean Puns

Pastor Tim

3103

Missing Wrench

A mechanic who worked out of his home had a dog named Mace. Mace had a bad habit of eating all the grass in the mechanic's lawn. So the mechanic had to keep Mace inside. The grass eventually became ... read more..

29 Jul

Clean Puns

Pastor Tim

2100

Missionaries

Missionaries do Emmanuel labor.... read more..

29 Jul

Clean Puns

Pastor Tim

3404

Mole Pun

Last night, I was frustrated by a mole who was digging up the hill toward the house, leaving a trail of mounds. So I went outside to take the hose and try to wash the mole out of its tunnel. As I le... read more..

29 Jul

Clean Puns

Pastor Tim

1807

Money Pun 2

When it comes to money, lots of people are satisfied to let the rest of the world go buy.... read more..

29 Jul

Clean Puns

Pastor Tim

1794

Money Pun 3

A lot of money is tainted. It taint yours and it taint mine.... read more..

29 Jul

Clean Puns

Pastor Tim

1958

Mongrel Pet

In the early 1700s, the captain of a Spanish pirate ship was very proud of his mongrel pet for its ability to bark once for "Si," and twice for "No."After being captured by a British commander, the do... read more..

29 Jul

Clean Puns

Pastor Tim

2283

Monkey Poker

Q: Why don't the monkeys in the jungle play poker any more?A: There are just too many Cheetahs.... read more..

29 Jul

Clean Puns

Pastor Tim

2871

Moose Hunting Pun

A Scotsman was visiting a friend in the North Woods of Canada. Both liked to hunt. They were hunting for deer, when all of a sudden, a moose popped up in front of them. It was so unexpected, neithe... read more..

29 Jul

Clean Puns

Pastor Tim

1994

More Name Puns 1

More Baby name ideas, based on your occupation.....PROFESSION: NAMESteam shovel operator's son: DougHair stylist's son: BobHomeopathic doctor's son: He... read more..

29 Jul

Clean Puns

Pastor Tim

2023

More Name Puns 2

More Baby name ideas, based on your occupation.....PROFESSION: NAMEUndertaker's son: BarryBeautician's son: CurlyGardener's daughter: ... read more..

29 Jul

Clean Puns

Pastor Tim

1785

More Name Puns 3

More Baby name ideas, based on your occupation.....PROFESSION: NAMEJeweler's daughter: OpalGastrointerologist's daughter: FannyButcher's daughter: ... read more..

29 Jul

Clean Puns

Pastor Tim

1913

More Name Puns 4

More Baby name ideas, based on your occupation.....PROFESSION: NAMEHot-dog vendor's son: FrankGambler's daughter: BettyExercise guru's son: ... read more..

29 Jul

Clean Puns

Pastor Tim

2631

More Name Puns 5

More Baby name ideas, based on your occupation.....PROFESSION: NAMETennis player's son: AceClothing manufacturer's daughter: Polly EstherTeacher's son: ... read more..

29 Jul

Clean Puns

Pastor Tim

1969

More Name Puns 6

More Baby name ideas, based on your occupation.....PROFESSION: NAMEMuseum curator's son: ArtBook printer's daughter: PaigeTrout fisher's daughter: B... read more..

29 Jul

Clean Puns

Pastor Tim

1787

More Name Puns 7

More Baby name ideas, based on your occupation.....PROFESSION: NAMEManicurist's son: HansAthlete's son: VictorPlumber's son: ... read more..

29 Jul

Clean Puns

Pastor Tim

1671

More Name Puns 8

More Baby name ideas, based on your occupation.....PROFESSION: NAMEIron worker's son: RustyTV show star's daughter: EmmyMovie star's son: ... read more..

29 Jul

Clean Puns

Pastor Tim

1723

More Name Puns 9

More Baby name ideas, based on your occupation.....PROFESSION: NAMEMinister's daughter: FaithDay-trader's daughter: HopeTelevangelist's daughter: ... read more..

29 Jul

Clean Puns

Pastor Tim

1706

Motorcycle Pun

A young man walked into our insurance office to purchase coverage for his new motorcycle. Only one question confused him. "Do you have a lien holderon the vehicle?""I've got a kickstand," the prospect... read more..

29 Jul

Clean Puns

Pastor Tim

14559

Mouse Pun

Two mice met behind a toaster in a Columbia, Maryland household."It's been a long time." the first said. "How's everything?""Great!" the second replied. "I have three brothers in pharmaceutical test... read more..

29 Jul

Clean Puns

Pastor Tim

2134

Mouse Review

Two mice live in a movie studio warehouse and are looking for food. Suddenly one hears the other chewing."What did you find?" he asks."I am not sure," comes the answer. "It looks like a piece of film ... read more..

29 Jul

Clean Puns

Pastor Tim

2043

Multiple Services

There was a congregation that decided to have four worship services each Sunday.There was one for those new to the faith.Another for those who liked traditional worship.One for those who had lost thei... read more..

29 Jul

Clean Puns

Pastor Tim

5977

Music Pun

Little Noah came into the house with a new harmonica. "Grandpa, do you mind if I play this in here?" "Of course not, Noah. I love music. In fact, when your grandma and I were young, music saved my l... read more..

29 Jul

Clean Puns

Pastor Tim

2475

Musical Note

The first graders were attending their first music lesson. The teacher was trying to begin at the beginning. She drew a musical staff on the blackboard and asked a little girl to come up and write a n... read more..

29 Jul

Clean Puns

Pastor Tim

6372

Mustard

Dijon vu - the same mustard as before.... read more..

29 Jul

Clean Puns

Pastor Tim

2569

Name Puns

Baby name ideas, based on your occupation.....PROFESSION: NAMELawyer's daughter: SueThief's son: RobLawyer's son: WillDoct... read more..