January 2015 - Monthly Archive

23 Jan

Quotes

Pastor Tim

2153

Quote #1423

"Secularism, materialism, and the intrusive presence of things have put out the light in our souls and turned us into a generation of zombies." - A.W. Tozer read more..

23 Jan

One-liners

Pastor Tim

1966

One-liner #0975

The only way I'm going to drop ten pounds is if I go shopping in England.... read more..

23 Jan

Illustrations

Pastor Tim

2894

A boy was helping his mother bring the clothes in off the line as a storm threatened. As they brought in the last armload and closed the door, the boy waved his hand at the heavens and said, "Okay Go... read more..

23 Jan

Clean Jokes

Pastor Tim

3322

20 Like You

A factory owner said to a store owner, "Thank you, Mr. Smith, for your patronage. I wish I had twenty customers like you." "Wow, it's nice to hear that, but I'm kind of surprised," admitted Smith. "Y... read more..

22 Jan

Funny Pictures

Pastor Tim

4219

Tatoo Regert

Oh, I think you have at least one. ... read more..

22 Jan

Illustrations

Pastor Tim

2253

Motivation

The cowboy walked into the tack shop. "How much for a pair of spurs?" he asked the sales clerk. "Forty dollars." The cowboy looked in his wallet, thought for a moment, then pulled out a twenty. "I'l... read more..

22 Jan

Clean Jokes

Pastor Tim

3824

Johnny's F

Little Johnny stared at his test paper. The big read "F" stared back at him. Freddie looked at his glum friend and asked, "Why did you get such a low grade on that test?" "Because of an absence," J... read more..

22 Jan

Quotes

Pastor Tim

2006

Quote #1422

"For every mile of road there's two miles of ditch." read more..

22 Jan

One-liners

Pastor Tim

2152

One-liner #0974

If ceiling fans could hold your weight, you'd never be bored again.... read more..

22 Jan

Clean Puns

Pastor Tim

2981

Flower Order

By the time the wedding planner finally bothered to order the flowers there were none left. The service ended up being quite lackadaisical.... read more..

22 Jan

Cybersalt News

Pastor Tim

1201

Cybersalt News - January 22, 2015

Oh look, Chicken Thursday! There is even a new chicken themed funny car picture on the Cybersalt site today. You will find "Coop Car" at:https://www.cybersalt.org/funny-car-pictures/coop-car Enjoy t... read more..

21 Jan

Funny Car Pictures

Pastor Tim

5623

Coop Car

It's definitely not a sedan - it's a coop! or The party is overwhen the coop car arrives. ... read more..

21 Jan

Pearly Gates Jokes

Pastor Tim

3031

Jonah Comeback

A little girl was talking to her teacher about Jonah being swallowed by a great fish. The teacher said it was physically impossible for a fish to swallow a human because even though they were large th... read more..

21 Jan

Quotes

Pastor Tim

1969

Quote #1421

"The grass isn't greener on the other side. It's greener where you water it." - @freesermons read more..

21 Jan

One-liners

Pastor Tim

2082

One-liner #0973

I'm allergic to food – I break out in fat.... read more..

21 Jan

Clean Puns

Pastor Tim

3254

Cookie Cutter House

"I just don't want to live in a cookie cutter house."- Gingerbread family read more..

21 Jan

Illustrations

Pastor Tim

2780

Inheritances

Jack has died. His lawyer is standing before the family and reads out Jack's Last Will and Testament. "To my dear wife Esther, I leave the house, 50 acres of land, and 1 million dollars." "To my son... read more..

21 Jan

Cybersalt News

Pastor Tim

1100

Cybersalt News - January 21, 2015

There is a new funny picture on the Cybersalt Site today. You'll find "Peppercide" at:www.cybersalt.org/funny-pictures/peppercide Enjoy the rest of today's mailing.... read more..

20 Jan

Funny Pictures

Pastor Tim

4022

Peppercide

It turns out vegans aren't so innocent after all! ... read more..

20 Jan

Clean Jokes

Pastor Tim

3136

Recruiting Crisis

The chief of staff of the Air Force decided that he would personally intervene in a recruiting crisis affecting all of our armed services. So he directed that a nearby Air Force base be opened and tha... read more..

20 Jan

Illustrations

Pastor Tim

2404

Courtesy

It was a Saturday afternoon, and Ray had rushed down to the local supermarket to hurriedly pick up some hamburger rolls, chips and a few condiments. The big game was going to be on, so he was having a... read more..

20 Jan

Clean Puns

Pastor Tim

2547

Rhythm Reunion

After the rhythm section got back together there were repercussions.... read more..

20 Jan

Quotes

Pastor Tim

1956

Quote #1420

"When it comes time to die, make sure all you have to do is die." - Jim Elliot read more..

20 Jan

One-liners

Pastor Tim

2064

One-liner #0972

I wish my wallet came with free refills.... read more..

20 Jan

Cybersalt News

Pastor Tim

1212

Cybersalt News - January 20, 2015

There is a new inspirational and mind boggling video on the Cybersalt site today. You will find "The Heavens Declare" at:www.cybersalt.org/videos/the-heavens-declare After watching that video, enjoy... read more..

19 Jan

Videos

Pastor Tim

3018

The Heavens Declare

To date, the highest resolution picture ever taken by mankind. "The heavens declare the glory of God; the skies proclaim the work of his hands."- Psalm 19:1 ... read more..

19 Jan

Quotes

Pastor Tim

1888

Quote #1419

"We all want progress, but if you're on the wrong road, progress means doing an about-turn and walking back to the right road; in that case, the man who turns back soonest is the most progressive." - read more..

19 Jan

One-liners

Pastor Tim

2352

One-liner #0971

At the store today, when the cashier said, "Strip down facing me" apparently she was referring to my credit card!... read more..

19 Jan

Clean Puns

Pastor Tim

2669

Transmission Guy

That guy from the transmission shop looks kinda shifty.... read more..

19 Jan

Illustrations

Pastor Tim

2397

The Good Old Days

It was the finish line of the Boston marathon. A first-time runner is hobbling away, having just finished. A grizzled old marathoner looks at him and says "You'll feel a lot worse tomorrow." He paus... read more..