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September 2016
Welcome to our Archives page. On this page you will find a total of
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Pastor Tim (106)
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Search
29 Sep
Cybersalt News
Pastor Tim
980
Cybersalt News - September 29, 2016
Oh look, Chicken Thursday! Yesterday, September 28, 2016, was the 18th anniversary of the Cybersalt Site. Thanks for being a part of the fun! There is a new funny sign video on the Cybersalt Site to
...
read more..
28 Sep
Clean Jokes
Pastor Tim
5437
Corporate Listening
The company I worked for had an employee suggestion competition, the entire staff was asked to submit entries that would save money for the firm. The winner was a man who suggested the company save p
...
read more..
28 Sep
One-liners
Pastor Tim
1689
One-liner #1128
I like an escalator because an escalator can never break, it can only become stairs. There would never be an escalator temporarily out of order sign, only an "Escalator temporarily stairs - sorry for
...
read more..
28 Sep
Funny Signs
Pastor Tim
3298
Don't Drink Sign
Also, "Don't Drink and Paint Signs."
...
read more..
28 Sep
Pearly Gates Jokes
Pastor Tim
3151
In the Pink
One day there was a guy who was driving home from work when his jeep broke down. He looked down the road and saw a pink house and decided that he would see if he could stay there for the night. He wa
...
read more..
28 Sep
Illustrations
Pastor Tim
2245
Common Sense
My friend has a lifesaving tool in her car. It's designed to cut through a seat belt if she gets trapped. She keeps it in the trunk.
...
read more..
28 Sep
Clean Puns
Pastor Tim
1789
English Buns
"Ah, synonym rolls . . . just like grammar used to make them."
read more..
28 Sep
Quotes
Pastor Tim
1857
Quote #1576
"Your worst days are never so bad that you are beyond the reach of God's grace. And your best days are never so good that you are beyond the need of God's grace." Jerry Bridges, The Discipline of G
read more..
25 Sep
Cybersalt News
Pastor Tim
1079
Cybersalt News - September 25, 2016
Sunday greetings everyone! My last two sermons (the first two after my 29 week stretch of not preaching) are on the Westside Bible Church web site. You'll find "Elephant Killing Wisdom" at:www.westsi
...
read more..
24 Sep
Clean Puns
Pastor Tim
1662
Self Static
"I keep shocking myself," said Tom, revolted.
read more..
24 Sep
Illustrations
Pastor Tim
2182
Someone Who Understands
Bob Weber, past president of Kiwanis International, told this story. He had spoken to a club in a small town and was spending the night with a farmer on the outskirts of the community. He had just rel
...
read more..
24 Sep
One-liners
Pastor Tim
1617
One-liner #1127
The hardness of the butter is proportional to the softness of the bread.
...
read more..
24 Sep
God's Penman
Rev. James L. Snyder
1928
Pursuing A Course In Apple-Fritterology
Recently, and by that I mean within the last month, my cell phone has been ringing out of my shirt pocket. It is rather frustrating because I rarely give my number to anybody. But there it goes, ringi
...
read more..
24 Sep
Quotes
Pastor Tim
2134
Quote #1575
"The eyes of all look to you, LORD, and you give them their food at the proper time. You open your hand and satisfy the desires of every living thing." Psalm 145:15-16
read more..
24 Sep
Clean Jokes
Pastor Tim
5073
Engine Trouble
Many years ago before the days of cell phones and data, a friend, driving home from a fishing trip in northern Michigan with his boat in tow, had engine trouble a few miles inland from Lake Huron. He
...
read more..
22 Sep
One-liners
Pastor Tim
1517
One-liner #1126
A clear conscience is usually the sign of a bad memory.
...
read more..
22 Sep
Clean Jokes
3507
Tiny Rose
A tiny sweet baby was born to a goober and his wife. They had always dreamed of having a child and naming her for the wife's beloved Aunt Rose. But the baby was so tiny and precious, Rose was too mu
...
read more..
22 Sep
Funny Cat Pictures
Pastor Tim
4742
Cat Elephant Butt
Is it a cat or an elephant? You be the judge.
...
read more..
22 Sep
Illustrations
Pastor Tim
2461
Choosing a Husband
A store that sells husbands has just opened in New York City, where a woman may go to choose a husband. Among the instructions at the entrance is a description of how the store operates. You may visit
...
read more..
22 Sep
Quotes
Pastor Tim
8814
Quote #1574
"When you're accustomed to privilege, equality feels like oppression."
read more..
22 Sep
Cybersalt News
Pastor Tim
960
Cybersalt News - September 22, 2016
Oh look, Chicken Thursday and happy 70th birthday to my dad! Don't forget the change in the sending schedule of the Cybersalt Digest, which is only being sent out on Sundays and Chicken Thursdays&nbs
...
read more..
21 Sep
Pearly Gates Jokes
Pastor Tim
3497
Pass the Pie Please
A boy with a pea shooter, ran out of ammunition, and discovering a box of laxative pills, tried one in his blow gun. To his great joy, it fit. There was a boarding house near by, and every Wedn
...
read more..
18 Sep
Sermons
Pastor Tim
1219
To Condemn or Not Condemn - There is No Question
Jesus' followers have not been called to a ministry of condemnation. Listen Online: {audio}podcast/sm20160918.mp3{/audio}
read more..
18 Sep
Clean Jokes
7346
Cow-isms
*Various organizational philosophies explained in "two cow" terms.* Socialism: You have two cows. You keep one and give one to your neighbor. Communism: You have two cows. The government takes them
read more..
18 Sep
God's Penman
Rev. James L. Snyder
1800
Thoughts, Plots and Other Dangerous Activities
One day this past week, I got up a little earlier than usual and to keep from waking up the Gracious Mistress of the Parsonage I got my coffee and went to the back porch to enjoy a quiet early morning
...
read more..
18 Sep
Cybersalt News
Pastor Tim
987
Cybersalt News - September 18, 2016
Sunday greetings everyone! I am announcing a change is the sending schedule of the Cybersalt Digest. It will only be sent out on Sundays and Chicken Thursdays. This will allow me to devote time
...
read more..
17 Sep
Clean Puns
Pastor Tim
1583
Lofty Vision
Optimistic Optometrist: “They’ll see. They’ll ALL see.”
...
read more..
17 Sep
Cybersalt News
Pastor Tim
1029
Cybersalt News - September 17, 2016
Nature, dogs, and many husbands abhor a vacuum. But, it seems that spinning tops love them. Check out today's FunBlog entry "Spinning Top in a Vacuum Chamber" at:www.cybersalt.org/funblog/spinning-top
...
read more..
16 Sep
Quotes
Pastor Tim
1496
Quote #1573
"It is much easier to have sympathy with suffering than it is to have sympathy with thought." - Oscar Wilde
read more..
16 Sep
Pearly Gates Jokes
Pastor Tim
3164
I Can Make This Putt
Playing golf with his buddies, my grandfather had to make a slick 25-foot putt. As he lined it up, he announced, "I have a dollar bill that says I can make this putt. Does anyone want to bet?" His th
...
read more..
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