2020 - Monthly Archive - Results from #120

29 Oct

Cybersalt News

Pastor Tim

558

Cybersalt News - October 29, 2020

Oh look, Chicken Thursday! Thank you to Ruth C. who let me know that in Sunday's mailing the Rev. James Snyder item was missing, with the Cybersalt News appearing a second time in its place... read more..

28 Oct

Pearly Gates Jokes

Pastor Tim

3167

Helpful Hints

1. Clumsy? Avoid cutting yourself while slicing vegetables get someone else to hold them while you chop away. 2. High blood pressure sufferers: simply cut yourself and bleed for a w read more..

28 Oct

Quotes

Susan Davis

777

Quote #1956

"Never let your common sense become so prominent and forceful that it pushes the Son of God to one side." - Oswald Chambers read more..

28 Oct

One-liners

Susan Davis

687

One-Liner #1518

Here I am! Now what are your other two wishes?... read more..

28 Oct

Clean Puns

Susan Davis

764

Buying Time

Clocks are supposed to go back Sunday, but the store I bought ours from has a "no return" policy!... read more..

28 Oct

Illustrations

Pastor Tim

1775

Transformation

A woman was asked by a co-worker, "What is it like to be a Christian?" The woman replied, "It is like being a pumpkin. God picks you from the patch, brings you in, and washes all the dirt off of you.... read more..

28 Oct

Clean Jokes

Pastor Tim

12664

Hiccups Cure

A man entered a drug store and asked to see the pharmacist. When the pharmacist came out, the man asked if he could give him a cure for the hiccups. The pharmacist immediately reached out and slappe... read more..

26 Oct

God's Penman

Rev. James L. Snyder

960

Junk Is a Matter of Personal Definition

I thought I had everything organized and in order. It just shows how useless my thinking is these days. There are many piles in my office and on my desk, and I know what is in each pile. Everything i... read more..

25 Oct

Cybersalt News

Pastor Tim

579

Cybersalt News - October 25, 2020

Sunday greetings everyone! The link to last week's video share was not totally obvious, so if you missed taking a flyby of Jupiter you can take it by clicking here. This week's video share is a blas... read more..

24 Oct

Clean Jokes

Pastor Tim

4671

Hymns for Professionals

DENTIST: Crown Him with many crowns CONTRACTORS: The church's one foundation OBSTETRICIANS: Come, labour on GOLFERS: There is a green hill far away POLITICIANS: Standing on the promises LIBRARI read more..

24 Oct

Illustrations

Pastor Tim

1702

Friendly Competition

A group of friends who prided themselves on their intelligence set out to have a contest of wits. Each person in turn asked a question, and anyone who volunteered an answer that was wrong dropped out.... read more..

24 Oct

Quotes

Susan Davis

791

Quote #1955

"A man who is born again is careful of his own soul. He tries not only to avoid sin - but also to avoid everything which may lead to it. He is careful about the company he keeps. He know that read more..

24 Oct

One-liners

Susan Davis

653

One-Liner #1517

All our emergencies are normal.... read more..

24 Oct

Clean Puns

Susan Davis

896

Gourd Math

What do you get if you divide the circumference of a pumpkin by its diameter? Pumpkin π... read more..

24 Oct

Clean Jokes

Pastor Tim

4194

Choruses vs Hymns

A young, new Christian went to his local small town church one weekend. He came home and his wife asked him how it was. "Well," said the young man, "It was good. They did something differ... read more..

22 Oct

Cybersalt News

Pastor Tim

626

Cybersalt News - October 22, 2020

Oh look, Chicken Thursday! I have been blessed to be working with a business coach in recent weeks. I wasn't really looking for one, and had anyone asked if I needed to talk to one I might not have a... read more..

21 Oct

Quotes

Susan Davis

736

Quote #1954

"You may think you can live fine without Christ, but you cannot afford to die without Him." - C. H. Spurgeon read more..

21 Oct

One-liners

Susan Davis

750

One-Liner #1516

I have become more optimistic and now believe that things could get worse.... read more..

21 Oct

Pearly Gates Jokes

Pastor Tim

2578

What's Kosher

A mom was carpooling her Sarah and friend Melanie to Hebrew School one day when she caught wind of the conversation between the two six-year-olds in the back seat... Melanie, "Our family is kosher" ... read more..

21 Oct

Clean Jokes

Pastor Tim

4045

Called In Sick

Negotiations between union members and their employer were at an impasse. The union denied that their workers were flagrantly abusing their contract's sick-leave provisions. One morning at the bargai... read more..

21 Oct

Clean Puns

Pastor Tim

2205

Igniting Communication

Matchmakers like to strike up a light conversation.... read more..

21 Oct

Illustrations

Pastor Tim

2049

Pastoring

Years ago, when our daughters were very young, we'd drop them off at our church's children's chapel on Sundays before the eleven o'clock service. One Sunday, just as I was about to open the door to th... read more..

21 Oct

Illustrations

Pastor Tim

2220

Riches

There once was a rich man who was near death. He was very grieved because he had worked so hard for his money and he wanted to be able to take it with him to heaven. So he began to pray that he might ... read more..

19 Oct

God's Penman

Rev. James L. Snyder

895

And Then It Was Silent No More

During this time of exclusive lockdown, I and the Gracious Mistress of the Parsonage have grown accustomed to silence. Don't get me wrong here. I do not object to noise as long as it's the right kind... read more..

18 Oct

Cybersalt News

Pastor Tim

590

Cybersalt News - October 18, 2020

Sunday greetings everyone! Thank you to Brian P. who alerted me to the source of the final item in last Chicken Thursday's "Homilies to Live By." It is originally from the 'Hitch-hiker's Guide to the... read more..

17 Oct

Quotes

Susan Davis

823

Quote #1953

"On a good day, enjoy yourself; on a bad day, examine your conscience. God arranges for both kinds of days so that we won't take anything for granted." - Solomon read more..

17 Oct

One-liners

Susan Davis

773

One-Liner #1515

How do I set a laser printer to stun?... read more..

17 Oct

Clean Jokes

Pastor Tim

3169

Lost in the Translation

Two diners at a very swanky eatery were shocked to see on the menu a dish of "hickory-smoked possum jowls in pancake syrup." They summoned a waiter to complain. Their waiters looked at the menu. Then... read more..

17 Oct

Clean Puns

Pastor Tim

3312

Thanks Mom and Dad!

Contrary to popular belief, it wasn't the apple on the tree that got us banished from Paradise. It was the pair on the ground.... read more..

17 Oct

Illustrations

Pastor Tim

1983

In a Perfect World

You could give away a baby bed without getting pregnant. Forget-me-nots would stimulate the memory. Doing what was good for you would be what you enjoyed doing the most. Pro baseball players would ... read more..