2022 - Monthly Archive - Results from #180

21 Sep

Clean Puns

Pastor Tim

2004

Not Bugged

Two frogs were sitting on a lily pad. One said to the other, "Time sure is fun when you are having flies!"... read more..

21 Sep

Illustrations

Pastor Tim

1899

Before - You take my breath away. After - I feel like I'm suffocating. Before - She says she loves the way I take control of a situation. After - She called me a controlling, manipulative egomaniac. ... read more..

21 Sep

Clean Jokes

Pastor Tim

3476

Science Fair Responses

Responses to questions on 5th and 6th grade science tests: - There are 26 vitamins in all, but some of the letters are yet to be discovered. - Genetics explains why you look like your father, and if... read more..

18 Sep

Cybersalt News

Pastor Tim

479

Cybersalt News - September 18, 2022

Sunday greetings, everyone. I am lining this mailing up late on Saturday night after returning from a full evening of racing on the last ever race night at our local speedway. Me, my son-in-law, Josh... read more..

17 Sep

Quotes

Susan Davis

514

Quote #2121

"When life seems hard, the courageous do not lie down and accept defeat; instead, they are all the more determined to struggle for a better future." - Queen Elizabeth II read more..

17 Sep

One-liners

Susan Davis

454

One-Liner #1684

I used to have a handle on life, but then it broke.... read more..

17 Sep

Clean Jokes

Pastor Tim

3413

Prayer Positions

Three ministers sat discussing the best positions for prayer while a telephone repairman worked nearby. "Kneeling is definitely best," claimed one minister. "No," another contended. "I get the best ... read more..

17 Sep

Clean Puns

Pastor Tim

2255

Silent Point

Please be quiet, we need to hear a pin drop.... read more..

17 Sep

Illustrations

Pastor Tim

1977

Death, Going Home

My friend was a Software Engineer for a major defense company. Well, he left to work at Paradigm Games and like many people there, let his hair and beard grow. He told me the other day that his gran... read more..

15 Sep

Cybersalt News

Pastor Tim

510

Cybersalt News - September 15, 2022

Oh look, Chicken Thursday! This week I received an email from our denomination's head office letting me know I am no longer licensed to perform weddings. I knew this was coming because it's their pol... read more..

14 Sep

Pearly Gates Jokes

Pastor Tim

2667

Elevated Train

A man has to attend a large convention in Chicago. On this particular trip he decides to bring his wife. When they arrive at their hotel and are shown to their room, the man says, "You rest here while... read more..

14 Sep

Quotes

Susan Davis

507

Quote #2120

"Perhaps we make too much of what is wrong and too little of what is right. The trouble with gloom is that it feeds upon itself and depression causes more depression." - Queen Elizabeth II read more..

14 Sep

Clean Jokes

Pastor Tim

3034

Breakfast Call

When my son was in the ninth grade, we reluctantly agreed to let him move into the basement. Then I realized how convenient it was to get him to the breakfast table. Before, I used to stand at the bot... read more..

14 Sep

Clean Puns

Pastor Tim

3021

Next Stop, Insanity!

Locomotive: A crazy reason for doing something.... read more..

14 Sep

Illustrations

Pastor Tim

1628

Outlook

Two actors who haven't seen each other in several weeks run into each other on the street. 1st actor: Haven't seen you in a while. How's everything going? 2nd actor: Pretty good. Two weeks ago I got... read more..

14 Sep

One-liners

Susan Davis

453

One-Liner 1683

Why is "phonics" not spelled the way it sounds?... read more..

11 Sep

Cybersalt News

Pastor Tim

461

Cybersalt News - September 11, 2022

Sunday greetings, everyone. The local speedway I raced at as the "Pastor of Disaster" is closing in a week. Last night was the last night for the class of racing I enjoyed driving the most - demo tru... read more..

10 Sep

Clean Jokes

Pastor Tim

4368

Crossing Chicken

Question: Why did the chicken cross the road? Answers: KINDERGARTEN TEACHER: To get to the other side. PLATO: For the greater good. ARISTOTLE: It is the nature of chickens to cross roads. KARL MA... read more..

10 Sep

Backpew

Jeff Larson

2712

Chicken Crossing

Why does the chicken cross the road cartoon illustrating a bible message... read more..

10 Sep

Quotes

Susan Davis

479

Quote #2119

"We must meet the uncertainties of this world with the certainty of the world to come." - A. W. Tozer read more..

10 Sep

Clean Puns

Pastor Tim

1924

Legal Fashion

Clothes don't necessarily make the man, but a good suit makes a lawyer.... read more..

10 Sep

One-liners

Susan Davis

451

One-liner #1682

My belt holds up my pants and my pants have belt loops that hold up the belt. What the heck is really going on down there? Who is the real hero? - Mitch Hedberg... read more..

10 Sep

Illustrations

Pastor Tim

5846

Offerings, Giving, Tithing

Patsy, 3, was at church with her parents. Her family had already given, but when the collection basket got close Patsy insisted that her mother give her some money to put in. Her mother tried to expl... read more..

08 Sep

Cybersalt News

Pastor Tim

427

Cybersalt News - September 8, 2022

Oh look, Chicken Thursday! There was a lot of pressure around Cybersalt World Headquarters yesterday. It had me experiencing a lot of ups and downs. With summer fading, Grandma Cybersalt and I finall... read more..

07 Sep

Pearly Gates Jokes

Pastor Tim

2911

Parking Lot Delivery

A doctor who spoke limited Spanish was rushed to a car in the ER parking lot to find a Spanish woman in the process of giving birth. Wanting to tell the woman to push he started yelling "Puta! Puta! P... read more..

07 Sep

Quotes

Susan Davis

472

Quote #2118

"My theory on housework is, if the item doesn't multiply, smell, catch fire, or block the refrigerator door, let it be. No one else cares. Why should you?" - Erma Bombeck read more..

07 Sep

One-liners

Susan Davis

497

One-Liner #1681

Doesn't "expecting the unexpected" make the unexpected expected?... read more..

07 Sep

Clean Puns

Pastor Tim

2160

Data Teach 'Em!

Where are delinquent disk drives sent? Boot camp!... read more..

07 Sep

Illustrations

Pastor Tim

1807

Get Along Better

Proven ways to get along better with EVERYONE: 1. Before you say anything to anyone, ask yourself 3 things: - Is it true? - Is it kind? - Is it necessary? 2. Make promises sparingly and keep them... read more..

07 Sep

Clean Jokes

Pastor Tim

2950

Look Like Mom

A two-and-a-half-year-old walked into the bathroom while her mother was putting on make-up. "I'm going to look just like you, Mommy!" she announced. "Maybe, when you grow up," her mother told her. ... read more..