March 2016 - Monthly Archive - Results from #180

09 Mar

Clean Puns

Pastor Tim

2012

Vision Trouble

I'm having some vision trouble today: I can't see myself doing anything.... read more..

09 Mar

Clean Jokes

Pastor Tim

3499

I was browsing in a souvenir shop when the man next to me struck up a conversation. Just as he was telling me that his wife was getting carried away with her shopping, a brief power shortage caused t... read more..

09 Mar

Quotes

Pastor Tim

1841

Quote #1446

"It is one thing to believe in God, but it is quite another thing to trust God." -Timothy Keller read more..

07 Mar

Cybersalt News

Pastor Tim

1209

Cybersalt News - March 8, 2016

There is a new Funny Picture on the Cybersalt Site today. You will find "Wet Paint Warning" at:www.cybersalt.org/funny-pictures/wet-paint-warning Enjoy the rest of today's mailing!... read more..

07 Mar

Funny Pictures

Pastor Tim

3580

Wet Paint Warning

In this case "Wet Paint" is not the most important warning to put around this building. ... read more..

07 Mar

Pearly Gates Jokes

Pastor Tim

6914

Window Washer

There was a gentleman in the hospital bed next to me. He was covered with bandages from head to toe. I said to him, "What do you do for a living?" He said, "I'm a former window washer." I ask... read more..

07 Mar

Clean Puns

Pastor Tim

1882

Friendly Correction

Correction from a friend can be a difficult blow, but will bring relief to your soul: call it a succour punch.... read more..

Freckles are Beautiful, Aging, True Beauty

07 Mar

Illustrations

Pastor Tim

2450

Freckles are Beautiful, Aging, True Beauty

An older woman and her little grandson, whose face was sprinkled with bright freckles, spent the day at the zoo. Lots of children were waiting in line to get their cheeks painted by a local artist who... read more..

07 Mar

One-liners

Pastor Tim

1656

One-liner #0996

I, put commas, in, weird places, so that, you, will, read, this, like William, Shatner.... read more..

07 Mar

Quotes

Pastor Tim

1566

Quote #1445

If we want to face ISIS, "our love needs to be more powerful than our sermons." - Johnnie Moore, March 1, 2016, Greater Toronto East Prayer Breakfast read more..

06 Mar

Cybersalt News

Pastor Tim

1121

Cybersalt News - March 6, 2016

Sunday greetings everyone. Since resuming the Cybersalt newsletters I have not yet mentioned a new role that Mrs. Cybersalt and I have taken on together in our association of churches (www.agcofcanad... read more..

05 Mar

Clean Jokes

Pastor Tim

3418

Card Dog

A man walked by a table in a hotel and noticed three men and a dog playing cards. The dog was exhibiting an extraordinary performance. "This is a very smart dog," the man commented. "He's not so sm... read more..

05 Mar

Clean Jokes

Pastor Tim

3487

Trooper Delivery

One day a State Trooper was pulling off an expressway near Chicago. When he turned onto the street at the end of the ramp, he noticed someone at a chicken place getting into his car. The driver ... read more..

05 Mar

Inspiration

Pastor Tim

1462

Operation Wheelchair

When Staff Sergeant Mark Horsley went undercover on the notorious Downtown Eastside of Vancouver, Canada he found something surprising. ... read more..

03 Mar

Cybersalt News

Pastor Tim

1162

Cybersalt News - March 4, 2016

When I moved from Toronto to Vancouver Island (Canada's balmiest climate) I realized that all my life I had been an Westerner trapped in an Easterner's body. Growing up I sometimes wondered if I could... read more..

03 Mar

FunBlog

Pastor Tim

3666

Trains Plowing Through Snow

I don't know about you, but I get a warm feeling when I see trains plowing through cold snow. ... read more..

03 Mar

Pearly Gates Jokes

Pastor Tim

2952

Mute Golf

A man was about to tee off on the golf course when he felt a tap on his shoulder and a man handed him a card that read "I am mute. I am not able to speak. May I play through, please?" The first man a... read more..

03 Mar

Quotes

Pastor Tim

1977

Quote #1444

"In seed time learn, in harvest teach, in winter enjoy."~ William Blake read more..

03 Mar

Clean Puns

Pastor Tim

2553

Flamingo Act

When my wife wanted me to stop acting like a flamingo, I had to put my foot down.... read more..

03 Mar

Illustrations

Pastor Tim

2035

Remarriage

Two women met for the first time since graduating from high school 40 years ago. One asked the other, "You were always so organized in school, "Did you manage to live a well planned life?" "Oh yes," ... read more..

03 Mar

One-liners

Pastor Tim

1708

One-liner #0995

So I just read Starbucks is planning on selling beer and wine; apparently it's getting difficult to sell sober people a $10 cup of coffee.... read more..

03 Mar

Clean Jokes

Pastor Tim

7430

Deer Hunting

A group of friends went deer hunting and paired off in twos for the day. That night, one of the hunters returned alone, staggering under the weight of an eight-point buck. "Where's Henry?" "Henry h... read more..

02 Mar

Pearly Gates Jokes

Pastor Tim

3013

Never Too Old

Two elderly gentlemen were visiting. "I guess you're never too old," the first one boasted. "Why just yesterday a pretty college girl said she'd be interested in dating me. But to be perfe... read more..

02 Mar

Cybersalt News

Pastor Tim

1032

Cybersalt News - March 2, 2016

I'm back. I had hoped to keep sending out mailings while Mrs. Cybersalt and I were back east in Toronto (visiting our daughter, son-in-law, and grandson) but fun family times trumped fun computer time... read more..

02 Mar

Illustrations

Pastor Tim

2153

Earthly Treasures

Showing his friend around his his home, Fred started to point out all of the collectibles he and his wife had acquired over their long years of marriage. "The day before I die, I'm going to sell ever... read more..

02 Mar

Quotes

Pastor Tim

1781

Quote #1443

"Faith is saying, 'Here I am' before we know our mission. Fear is wanting to know our mission before we say, 'Here I am.'" - Leonard Sweet read more..

02 Mar

Clean Puns

Pastor Tim

2417

Martial Arts

Martial Arts: I use my boxing skills sparringly.... read more..

02 Mar

One-liners

Pastor Tim

1565

One-liner #0994

My favorite childhood memory is not paying bills.... read more..

02 Mar

Clean Jokes

Pastor Tim

3783

Moving Label

Having moved 15 times during our 37-year marriage, my husband and I appreciate movers who take the time to label carefully boxes they pack for us. The accuracy of labels can make a huge difference wh... read more..