September 2019 - Monthly Archive

14 Sep

Quotes

Susan Davis

1316

Quote #1853

"Holiness is not the way to Christ. Christ is the way to holiness." - Adrian Rogers read more..

14 Sep

Clean Puns

Susan Davis

1129

Diet Exclamation

"I've lost a lot of weight," Tom expounded. read more..

14 Sep

One-liners

Susan Davis

941

One-Liner #1412

Don't be redundant by repeating yourself!... read more..

14 Sep

God's Penman

Rev. James L. Snyder

1121

It Was a Belly-Binge Kind of Day

It’s not often that a day goes my way. Occasionally, I have a day that focuses on my desires and me. It was a Monday evening right after supper and the Gracious Mistress of the Parsonage and I were w... read more..

14 Sep

Clean Jokes

Pastor Tim

3787

Cereal Adjustment

Deciding to eat healthier breakfasts, my brother-in-law declared that oatmeal would now be his cereal of choice. But after eating his first bowl, he told my sister, "I hope I develop a taste for the ... read more..

14 Sep

Illustrations

Pastor Tim

1927

Prayer mx24

Most of us have now learned to live with voice mail as a necessary part of our lives. Have you ever wondered what it would be like if God decided to install voice mail? Imagine praying and hearing the... read more..

12 Sep

Cybersalt News

Pastor Tim

631

Cybersalt News - September 12, 2019

Oh look, Chicken Thursday. The weather forecast for Cybersalt World Headquarters today is lots of rain - and we need it! Enjoy the rest of today's mailing. ~ Pastor Tim... read more..

11 Sep

One-liners

Susan Davis

840

One-Liner #1411

Self-Annihilating Description He's a typical man of distinction.... read more..

11 Sep

Pearly Gates Jokes

Pastor Tim

3979

Lazy Fishing

A visitor from Buffalo was strolling along the California surf one morning. During his walk he came upon a fellow, fishing pole clutched in his hands, sound asleep against the side of a huge coastal r... read more..

11 Sep

Quotes

Susan Davis

1003

Quote #1852

"I would like to think money wouldn't change me; yet when I'm playing Monopoly I'm a terrible person." - Unknown read more..

11 Sep

Clean Puns

Susan Davis

1058

Self-Serve Dentistry

Patient: Mind if I turn on the nitrous oxide? Dentist: Knock yourself out!... read more..

11 Sep

Clean Jokes

Pastor Tim

3730

Excerpts from A Dog's Diary

Day number 180 8:00 am - OH BOY! DOG FOOD! MY FAVORITE!9:30 am - OH BOY! A CAR RIDE! MY FAVORITE!9:40 am - OH BOY! A WALK! MY FAVORITE!10:30 am - OH BOY! A CAR RIDE! MY FAVORITE!11:30 am - OH BOY! DO... read more..

11 Sep

Illustrations

Pastor Tim

1920

Teenagers

"Doctor, I'd like you to evaluate my 13-year-old son." "OK: He's suffering from a transient psychosis with an intermittent rage disorder, punctuated by episodic radical mood swings, but his prognosis read more..

A Key On the Table Is Worth Many A Chuckle

08 Sep

God's Penman

Rev. James L. Snyder

1250

A Key On the Table Is Worth Many A Chuckle

When it comes to forgetting anything, I am king of the hill. My forgetting has nothing to do with age because I have been forgetting as long as I can remember. Of course, with age comes an excuse for... read more..

08 Sep

Cybersalt News

Pastor Tim

608

Cybersalt News - September 8, 2019

Sunday greetings everyone - and happy September! Recently, Rev. James Snyder got a chuckle when his wife took a turn forgetting something. You can read "A Key On the Table Is Worth Many A Chuckle" at... read more..

07 Sep

One-liners

Susan Davis

884

One-Liner #1410

Self-Annihilating Description He knew everything, but that's all.... read more..

07 Sep

Quotes

Susan Davis

1242

Quote #1851

"... all the days ordained for me were written in your book before one of them came to be." - Psalm 139:16b (NIV) read more..

07 Sep

Clean Puns

Susan Davis

1347

Clown Soup

If you boil a funny bone it becomes a laughing stock. That's humerus.... read more..

07 Sep

Clean Jokes

Pastor Tim

3161

Vet Come Back

Dr. Cutter is the local veterinarian in Kennebec County, Maine. He was well-known in town for his wry humor. He surpassed himself one summer day when a city dog was brought to him after an encounter w... read more..

07 Sep

Illustrations

Pastor Tim

1998

Don't Go To Bed

I've heard it said don't go to bed while hanging on to sorrow, you may not have the chance to laugh with those you love tomorrow. You may not mean the words you speak when anger takes its toll, you m... read more..

05 Sep

Cybersalt News

Pastor Tim

621

Cybersalt News - September 5, 2019

Oh look, Chicken Thursday - and my eldest daughter's 31st birthday! She had cancer when she was 14 and I am grateful she is alive to make me feel a bit older today. Enjoy the rest of today's mailing!... read more..

04 Sep

Quotes

Susan Davis

1843

Quote #1850

"God left you on earth for a purpose. Do it." - Unknown read more..

04 Sep

Clean Puns

Susan Davis

1110

I Can't Get Up

I saw a sign that said, "Falling Rocks!" So I tried, and it doesn't.... read more..

04 Sep

Pearly Gates Jokes

Pastor Tim

3541

Seeing Eye Dog

There is so much theologically incorrect about this joke I should send it out over three mailings! A blind man with his seeing eye dog walked into a bar. The blind man picked up the dog and swung it... read more..

04 Sep

Clean Jokes

Pastor Tim

3450

Baby Wrap

Part of my job as a public-health nurse is teaching new parents how to care for their infants. As I was demonstrating how to wrap a newborn, a young Asian couple turned to me and said, "You mean we s... read more..

04 Sep

Illustrations

Pastor Tim

2087

Grandkids, Bragging

Three little boys were bragging about how tough they were."I'm so tough", said the first boy, "that I can wear out a pair of shoes in a week." "Well", said the second little boy, "I'm so tough, I can... read more..

03 Sep

One-liners

Susan Davis

942

One-Liner #1409

Self-Annihilating Descriptions Words are incapable of describing what I am about to tell you.... read more..

01 Sep

Cybersalt News

Pastor Tim

669

Cybersalt News - September 1, 2019

Sunday greetings everyone - and happy September! Recently, Rev. James Snyder was battling viruses and vermin while he worked on the church computer. You can read "Stuck between a Virus and a Varmint"... read more..