November 2005 - Monthly Archive

17 Nov

Clean Jokes

Pastor Tim

3038

Compliments to the Chef

I have a reputation for not being a fantastic cook. One evening I worked particularly hard on a new recipe, and once again it didn't turn out as well as I'd hoped.My son, always sweet and conscious of... read more..

16 Nov

Guest Authors

Pastor Tim

14172

Forgiving an Absent Dad

Apart from the power of Jesus Christ, I don't know how anyone can forgive a parent who has abandoned his or her family. Yet I do know that forgiveness is a prerequisite for finding personal peace. And... read more..

16 Nov

Christmas Jokes

Pastor Tim

4374

Top Ten Y2K Books For Christmas

10."Candlelight Critters-- the Lost Art of Shadow Puppetry"9."The Horders & Hunters Almanac"8."Condo Cooking with Wood--How To Feed Your Family Without Burning Down Your Investment!"7."SPAM-O-RIFF read more..

16 Nov

Clean Jokes

Pastor Tim

2684

Arrangements

It was a difficult subject to bring before his aged mother, but John felt that he must: "Mom, you're no longer a spring chicken and you do need to think ahead of what'll happen in the future. Why don'... read more..

15 Nov

Peggie's Den

Peggie Bohanon

4730

Let's Rake Leaves

There's a big beautiful oak tree in our back yard, its boughs heavy-laden with leaves--well, not any more! They will soon be falling--leaf by leaf--and covering the ground, crying out, "Residents--RAK... read more..

15 Nov

Clean Jokes

Pastor Tim

2864

Classmate Reunion

While waiting for my first appointment in the reception room of a new dentist, I noticed his certificate, which bore his full name.Suddenly, I remembered that a tall, handsome boy with the same name h... read more..

14 Nov

Clean Jokes

Pastor Tim

6862

Gifts for Men

Buying gifts for men is not nearly as complicated as it is for women. Follow these rules and you should have no problems. Rule #1:When in doubt - buy him a cordless drill. It does not matter if... read more..

14 Nov

Wonders of Creation

3337

Wonders of Creation - Origin of Life

Where did life come from? There are only two main views: the Biblical (Creationist) view and the ?natural? view (Naturalism or Evolutionism). The Biblical explanation describes just the ?bare bones? o... read more..

14 Nov

Clean Jokes

Pastor Tim

3050

Empty Nest Craft

I am a first-grade teacher and a new empty-nester. One night I was trying out an art project: making a person with simple materials. I took a coat hanger, attached a paper-plate face, put a shirt on ... read more..

13 Nov

Clean Jokes

Pastor Tim

3955

Little Tim's Goldfish

Little Tim was in the garden filling in a hole when his neighbor peered over the fence. Interested in what the cheeky-faced youngster was up to, he politely asked, "Whatcha doing, Tim?" "My gol... read more..

13 Nov

Melva's Devotions

Melva Cooper

5040

A Thanksgiving Psalm

"I give you thanks, O Lord, with all my heart."Psalm 138:1 (NLT) The Thanksgiving holiday is a good time to focus on our blessings and declare our gratitude to God. In 1621, following harvest, the p read more..

13 Nov

Clean Jokes

Pastor Tim

2703

Golf Hole

A young minister and Mr. Sims, an elderly parishioner, were playing golf. The minister's game was off and the old man was beating him quite badly.At the end of the game, the Mr. Sims tried to console ... read more..

12 Nov

Clean Jokes

Pastor Tim

2985

100GB bug

Experts warned today of a new and deadly threat to our beleaguered civilization: the 100GB Bug. As most people know, McDonald's restaurant signs show the number of hamburgers the giant chain has sold.... read more..

Passport , Passport, Passport . . . Anyone?

12 Nov

Guest Authors

Pastor Tim

5246

Passport , Passport, Passport . . . Anyone?

While doing business in the Post Office one day I noticed a rack holding PASSPORT application forms. Thinking that this was the beginning, or a first step to a long held dream of visiting a foreign co... read more..

12 Nov

Clean Jokes

Pastor Tim

2858

Church Visit

My grandson, Justin, returned from his first time in church and was asked how it went.He said, "The music was nice, but the commercial was too long."... read more..

11 Nov

Clean Jokes

Pastor Tim

3944

Y2K - Not so Bad

January 1, 2000 Re: Vacation Pay Dear Valued Employee: Our records indicate that you have not used any vacation time over the past 100 year(s). As I'm sure you are aware, employees are granted ... read more..

11 Nov

Peggie's Den

Peggie Bohanon

4888

Celebrate . . . or Vegetate?

There's a week-long celebration this week in Branson, Missouri, when this tiny town, made famous with its family-friendly entertainment, rolls out the red carpet for Veterans Day--to honor and revere ... read more..

10 Nov

Clean Jokes

Pastor Tim

3918

The Night Before Y2K

'Twas the night before New Year,and all through the nation,We awaited Y2K,the millennium sensation.The chips were replaced in computers with care,In hopes that "Ol' Bugsy" wouldn't stop there.While so read more..

10 Nov

The Spur

Marcia Lee Laycock

4192

Do We Need Another Remembrance Day?

We've been seeing the familiar red poppies pinned on lapels and collars for some time now. Today is Remembrance Day, here in Canada. Schools are closed, as are many businesses. At eleven o?clock on th... read more..

10 Nov

Clean Jokes

Pastor Tim

2676

Marrying Young

My sister, went to the department store to check out the bridal registry of our niece whose wedding was coming up soon. When my sister returned from the store, she tossed the gift list on a table and... read more..

09 Nov

Clean Jokes

Pastor Tim

4178

Y1K Problem

Canterbury, England. AD 999. An atmosphere close to panic prevails today throughout Europe as the millennial year 1000 approaches, bringing with it the so-called "Y1K Bug," a menace which, unti... read more..

09 Nov

Cybersalt Shaker

Pastor Tim

5430

PTMYG

BIRD FLU! BIRD FLU! BIRD FLU! There, now I've gone on and on and on about it too. The world is all aflutter about the possibly coming bird flu pandemic that threatens to make humanity sicker than man... read more..

09 Nov

Clean Jokes

Pastor Tim

3666

Ball Markers

A Golfer walks into the pro shop at the local course and asks the golf pro if they sell ball markers.The golf pro says, "Yes, they are just $1.00 each. "The guy gives the golf pro a dollar and says h... read more..

08 Nov

Clean Jokes

Pastor Tim

3845

Y zero K

Message from: RomeJanuary 18, 1 BC Dear Cassius, Are you still working on the Y zero K problem? This change from BC to AD is giving us a lot of headaches and we haven't much time left. I don't know ... read more..

08 Nov

Wonders of Creation

3349

Wonders of Creation - Intelligent Design

Suppose someone built a car with everything as it should be, but instead of the usual tyres, they filled the inner tubes with concrete, or left out the steering wheel. The car would still go, but it w... read more..

08 Nov

Clean Jokes

Pastor Tim

2928

Pie Manners

In a country home that seldom had guests, the young son was eager to help his mother after his father appeared with two dinner guests from the office.When the dinner was nearly over, the boy went to t... read more..

07 Nov

Guest Authors

Pastor Tim

4645

What Did You Say?

According to pollster George Gallup Jr., "Americans revere the Bible, but...by and large, they don't read it." As a result, many don't know what it says.It's easy for Christians to forget how baffling... read more..

07 Nov

Clean Jokes

Pastor Tim

3562

Goober Y2K Date Change Project Status:

Y-to-K Date Change Project Status: Our staff has completed the 18 months of work on time and on budget. We have gone through every line of code in every program in every system. We have analyze... read more..

07 Nov

Clean Jokes

Pastor Tim

2629

Ever Driven a Honda?

A biker is riding a new motorcycle on the highway. While passing a car, he knocks on the window. The driver of the car opens the window, "Yes?""Ever driven a Honda motorcycle?""No I haven't"The biker ... read more..

06 Nov

Dr. Harold McNabb

3898

Is it Too Late?

On July 25, 2000, Air France Concorde flight 4590 on July 25, 2000, which crashed on take off in Paris. One hundred passengers, nine crew, and four people on the ground were killed when the Concorde b... read more..