These are real ads from a newspaper.

1.  1 MAN, 7 WOMAN HOT TUB -- $850 or best offer

2.  AMANA WASHER $100.  OWNED BY CLEAN BACHELOR WHO SELDOM WASHED.

3.  SNOW BLOWER FOR SALE...ONLY USED ON SNOWY DAYS.

4.  FREE PUPPIES...PART GERMAN SHEPHERD PART DOG.

5.  2 WIRE MESH BUTCHERING GLOVES, 1 5-finger, 1 3-finger, PAIR: $15

6.  TICKLE ME ELMO, STILL IN BOX, COMES WITH IT'S OWN 1988 MUSTANG, AUTO TRANS., EXCELLENT CONDITION - $6800

7.  DO SOMETHING SPECIAL FOR YOUR VALENTINE - HAVE YOUR SEPTIC TANK PUMPED

8.  FREE PUPPIES: 1/2 COCKER SPANIEL - 1/2 SNEAKY NEIGHBOR DOG

9.  FREE YORKSHIRE TERRIER.  8 YEARS OLD.  UNPLEASANT LITTLE DOG

10. GERMAN SHEPHERD.  85 lbs.  NEUTERED.  SPEAKS GERMAN.  FREE.

11. FREE 1 CAN OF PORK & BEANS WITH PURCHASE OF 3 BR 2 BATH HOME.

12. NORDIC TRAC $300 - HARDLY USED - CALL CHUBBIE at:

13. BILL'S SEPTIC CLEANING - "WE HAUL AMERICAN MADE PRODUCTS"

14. FOUND: DIRTY WHITE DOG...LOOKS LIKE A RAT...BEEN OUT AWHILE.....BETTER BE A REWARD

15. HUMMELS - LARGEST SELECTION EVER - "IF IT'S IN STOCK, WE HAVE IT"

16. CUTE KITTEN FOR SALE, 2 CENTS OR BEST OFFER

17. WHIRLPOOL BUILT IN OVEN -- FROST FREE!

18. '93 PONTIAC LEMONS - LOW MILES

19. KITTENS 8 WEEKS OLD - SEEKING GOOD CHRISTIAN HOME.

20. TIRED OF WORKING FOR ONLY $9.75 PER HOUR?  WE OFFER PROFIT.  SHARING AND FLEXIBLE HOURS.  STARTING PAY: $7 - $9 PER HOUR.