Entertainment

Helium was up.

Feathers were down.

Paper was stationary.

Fluorescent tubing was dimmed in light trading.

Knives were up sharply.

Cows steered into a bull market.

Pencils lost a few points.

Hiking equipment was trailing.

Elevators rose, while escalators continued their slow decline.

Weights were up in heavy trading.

Light switches were off.

Mining equipment hit rock bottom.

Diapers remain unchanged.

Shipping lines stayed at an even keel.

The market for raisins dried up.

Dr Pepper fizzled.

Caterpillar stock inched up a bit.

Sun peaked at midday.

Balloon prices were inflated.

Scott Tissue touched a new bottom.

When the driver of a huge trailer lost control of his rig, he plowed into an empty tollbooth and smashed it to pieces. He climbed down from the wreckage and within a matter of minutes, a truck pulled up and discharged a crew of workers.

The men picked up each broken piece of the former tollbooth and spread some kind of creamy substance on it.

Then they began fitting the pieces together. In less than a half hour, they had the entire tollbooth reconstructed and looking good as new.

"Astonishing!" the truck driver said to the crew chief. "What was the white stuff you used to get all the pieces together?"

The crew chief said, "Oh, that was tollgate booth paste."

When the driver of a huge trailer lost control of his rig, he plowed into an empty tollbooth and smashed it to pieces.

He climbed down from the wreckage and within a matter of minutes, a truck pulled up and discharged a crew of state department of transportation workers.

The men picked up each broken piece of the former tollbooth and spread some kind of creamy substance on it.

Then they began fitting the pieces together.

In less than a half hour, they had the entire tollbooth reconstructed and looking good as new.

"Astonishing!" the truck driver said to the crew chief.

"What was the white stuff you used to get all the pieces together?"

The crew chief said, "Oh, that was tollgate booth paste."

This weekend while shopping in a local toy store, I came across a long line of people waiting for a promised shipment of dolls from Mattel. As I scanned the line, I noticed a friend waiting with all the others. I knew my friend had no daughters or young relatives, so I figured he must like the dolls himself.

"Bill," I said going up to him, "I didn't know you were a collector!"

"I'm not," he replied.

"Oh," I said, "You're buying a gift, then."

"No, not at all," my friend responded.

"If you don't mind my asking then Bill," I said, "Why are you standing in this line?"

"Oh that," he answered. "It's like this," my friend stated, . . ."I've never been able to resist a barbie queue!"