Having a weird mom builds character.
Entertainment
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My wife told me I was immature this morning; so I told her to get out of my fort!
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It was very crowded at the supermarket, and the customer in front of me had a large order.
As the harried looking clerk lifted the final bag for her, its bottom gave way, sending the contents crashing to the floor.
"They just don't make these bags like they used to," the clerk blurted to the customer.
"That was supposed to happen in your driveway!"
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When I was young, my family was really poor. Everything I wore - socks, blouses, even handkerchiefs - had been darned over and over by my mother.
I wasn't the smartest or the prettiest, but I sure was the best darned kid in the neighborhood!
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A woman arrived at the Gates of Heaven. While she was waiting for Saint Peter to greet her, she peeked through the gates. She saw a beautiful banquet table. Sitting all around were her parents and all the other people she had loved and who had died before her.
They saw her and began calling greetings to her "Hello - How are you! We've been waiting for you! Good to see you."
When Saint Peter came by, the woman said to him, "This is such a wonderful place! How do I get in?"
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