Entertainment

It was testimony night in the church. A lady got up and said, "We are living in a wicked land where sin is on every hand. I have had a terrible fight with the old devil all week."

Whereupon her husband, who was sitting glumly by her side said, "It's not all my fault either; she's tough to get along with."

A little boy, not accustomed to seeing a priest in his "work uniform" went up to the priest and asked, "Why do you dress so funny?".  The priest replied, "This is the uniform that I wear when I work".

The child, still staring at him, asked, "Do you have a boo boo?" The priest was somewhat puzzled, but quickly figured out that the child was looking at his white and black Roman collar.  The priest pulled out the white plastic insert and showed it to the child telling him that it was also part of his uniform.

On the back side of the collar there was some writing: "Wash with warm soapy water." The priest showed this to the little boy and then asked him "Do you know what these words say?

The little boy, obviously much too young to read, stated, "I sure do".  The priest a little taken aback then replies, "OK then, tell me what they say".

The little boy then replies, "Kills fleas and ticks for up to six months."

During the second Gulf War, I was an Air Force colonel. I routinely flew on different aircraft to familiarize myself with their capabilities. One day I was aboard an intelligence aircraft where each crew member was surrounded by complex gear.

A young major showed me his computer screen. "That's a chat screen, Sir," the soldier said. "We use it to relay enemy information to the crew. It's like instant messaging."

Nodding, I moved down the line. Flashing on an airman's screen several feet away was this warning: "Heads up! The colonel's on the way!"

If you are wondering what a Goober is, there is a picture of one at:

https://www.cybersalt.org/pastor-tim-s-cleanlaugh-site/what-is-a-goober

A goober goes to a show and after sitting down, a ventriloquist comes on the stage, and goes through the routine goober jokes.

Suddenly the goober jumps up screaming, blaming the man for the way she is treated at work and presented in the media.

The ventriloquist starts to apologize.

The goober then looks at him and says, "Look, you stay out of this, I'm talking to that little guy on your knee."