The New Alphabet for Older People
A is for arthritis
B is for bad back
C is for the chest pains. Corned beef? Cardiac?
D is for dental decay and decline
E is for eyesight--can't read that top line
F is for fissures and fluid retention
G is for gas (which I'd rather not mention)
And other gastrointestinal glitches
H is high blood pressure
I is for itches