February 2016 - Monthly Archive

11 Feb

Quotes

Pastor Tim

1779

Quote #1438

"I like going the extra mile, it's usually less crowded." read more..

11 Feb

Illustrations

Pastor Tim

2297

Several men are in the locker room of a golf club. A cell phone on a bench rings and a man engages the hands free speaker-function and begins to talk. Everyone else in the room stops to listen. MAN:... read more..

11 Feb

Clean Puns

Pastor Tim

2086

Horse Knock-Off

You mean you've never knocked a guy off a horse with a lance before? Surely you joust!... read more..

11 Feb

One-liners

Pastor Tim

1676

One-liner #0989

So apparently the security guard at Safeway didn't believe that life gave me that lemon.... read more..

11 Feb

Clean Jokes

Pastor Tim

4446

Missing You

Dave went on a business trip for a few days. When he returned, his wife reported that the dog really missed him. "She spent every night at the front door, awaiting your return," she said. "What an ... read more..

11 Feb

Cybersalt News

Pastor Tim

1111

Cybersalt News - February 11, 2016

Oh look, Chicken Thursday!For the whole Chicken Thursday explanation check out:www.cybersalt.org/news/the-story-of-chicken-thursday For those of you who tend to get in trouble for forgetting Valentin... read more..

11 Feb

Pearly Gates Jokes

Pastor Tim

4336

Hat Headline

The Pope is visiting DC and President Obama takes him out for an afternoon on the Potomac . . . sailing on the presidential yacht. They're admiring the sights when, all of a sudden the Pope's hat (ec... read more..

11 Feb

Illustrations

Pastor Tim

2237

That 'Green' Thing

In the line at the store today, the cashier told an older woman ahead of me that plastic bags weren't good for the environment. The woman apologized to her and explained, "We didn't have the green thi... read more..

11 Feb

Quotes

Pastor Tim

1974

Quote #1437

"We are not called to be defenders of the Truth but to live the Truth, which is Truth's best defense." ~Mabel Boggs Sweet read more..

11 Feb

Clean Puns

Pastor Tim

2733

Fish Eyes

Fisheye lenses make the world go round.... read more..

11 Feb

One-liners

Pastor Tim

1548

One-liner #0988

Just once it'd be nice to hear the word "sir," without it immediately being followed by,"you're making a scene." read more..

11 Feb

Clean Jokes

Pastor Tim

3409

Deep Trouble

A man driving his car down a country road was forced to stop before a giant puddle blocking the entire way. Looking to the side of the road, the man noticed a goober leaning on a fence. "Think it's sa... read more..

09 Feb

Cybersalt News

Pastor Tim

1116

Cybersalt News - February 10, 2016

Happy 3rd birthday to our grandson Torre! Even though the Cybersalt Newsletters have not been going out for some time, that doesn't mean there weren't new pages added to the Cybersalt Site. To ... read more..

09 Feb

Illustrations

Pastor Tim

1674

Change Your Stance

The newest member of the country club was taking his initiatory round of golf with the club's officers. He was nervous about making a good impression. He teed up the ball, spread his feet apart, fixed... read more..

09 Feb

One-liners

Pastor Tim

1872

One-liner #0987

When the moon hits your eye, like a big pizza pie ... that's a lawsuit. read more..

09 Feb

Clean Jokes

Pastor Tim

3311

If You Love Something Variations

THE ORIGINAL VERSION:If you love something,Set it free...If it comes back, it's yours;If it doesn't, it never was yours. THE PESSIMIST VERSION:If you love somebody,Set her free ...If she ever comes b... read more..

09 Feb

Quotes

Pastor Tim

1580

Quote #1436

"Jesus didn't come to tell us the answer to the questions of life, he came to be the answer."- Timothy Keller read more..

09 Feb

Clean Puns

Pastor Tim

2018

Dating a Philosopher

Trying to date a philosophy professor? He doesn't even know if you exist or not!... read more..

Eye for an Eye: You have heard that it was said

07 Feb

Sermons

Pastor Tim

1401

Eye for an Eye: You have heard that it was said

Jesus clarifies what God's desire is for our hearts in regard to others suffering for things they have done. Listen Online: {audio}podcast/sm20160207.mp3{/audio} read more..

06 Feb

Clean Jokes

Pastor Tim

3323

Car Help Line

General Motors doesn't have a "help line" for people who don't know how to drive, because people don't buy cars like they buy computers. But, imagine if they did . . . HELPLINE: "General Motors... read more..