2005 - Monthly Archive - Results from #630

11 May

Misc

bwells25

1907

My Testimony

My name is Becky. I live in a little town called Georgetown, Ohio. I grew up in the next town over, and was raised in church by my God-fearing mother. I was saved as a teenager, but ... read more..

10 May

Melva's Devotions

Melva Cooper

4346

"Call 911, call 911," eight year-old Levi was scrambling to get help for his mother who had slipped and fallen on the wet tile floor in their kitchen. Gasping from the pain as her knee buckled under h read more..

10 May

Clean Jokes

Pastor Tim

3673

First Sermon

At his first service, the new preachers sermon was extremely long and dull. As he preached, he drank from pitcher of water until it was completely gone.After the service, someone asked an old woman o... read more..

09 May

Clean Jokes

Pastor Tim

45384

Heat Wave Humor

Nothing personal against Texans - change it to any place that is hot. "It's So Hot In Texas That......" *The birds have to use pot holders to pull worms out of the ground. *The potatoes cook undergrou... read more..

09 May

Dr. Harold McNabb

4328

Wait

Shortly after starting her perfume business, Estee Lauder realized she had to persuade a cosmetics buyer to place her products in many stores throughout the country. At 9 A.M., Lauder was in the offic... read more..

09 May

Clean Jokes

Pastor Tim

4108

Price Reduction

Our minister announced that admission to a church social event would be six dollars per person. "However, if you're over 65," he said, " the price will be only $5.50."From the back of the congregatio... read more..

09 May

Misc

pirate

2191

300 miles later

& I am back. Was a good trip, though we ran into flooding accross the motorway on the way back. Thank God for a safe trip - now all I have to do is get the rental car back in the morning. read more..

08 May

Misc

pirate

1788

Another Day...

I remembered just in time, as I rolled sleepily out of bed, not to get dressed in 'Work Clothes". Instead today I am travelling North to fetch my daughter from Uni, she will be preparing for her fin... read more..

08 May

Clean Jokes

Pastor Tim

4962

Goober Travelers

The following are actual stories provided by travel agents: * I had someone ask for an aisle seat so that their hair wouldn't get messed up by being near the window. * A client called in inquiring abo... read more..

08 May

The Spur

Marcia Lee Laycock

3233

Playing for the Home Town Crowd

I imagine it's a very scary thing for athletes who have to perform in front of a crowd. But ask any one of them and they?ll tell you it's great to play in their home-town. The fans can make the differ... read more..

07 May

Clean Jokes

Pastor Tim

4048

Wayward Cessna

You've all heard of the Air Force's ultra-high security, super-secret base in Nevada, known simply as "Area 51?" Well, late one afternoon, the Air Force folks out at Area 51 were very surprised to see... read more..

07 May

Peggie's Den

Peggie Bohanon

3243

The Well Watcher

Sat on a bench at the mall one day, and I mall-watched! A parade of humanity streamed by--people of every feature, face, and fashion imaginable. Now my real preference is to "boardwalk-watch" by the o... read more..

06 May

Clean Jokes

Pastor Tim

4958

Shopkeeper's Competition

The shopkeeper was dismayed when a brand new business much like his own opened up next door and erected a huge sign which read BEST DEALS. He was horrified when another competitor opened up on his ri... read more..

06 May

God's Penman

Rev. James L. Snyder

3952

My Mother's Amazing Meatloaf Mystery

Every mother harbors a mystery of some sort. Many handed down from one generation to the next forming a bond so strong no man can penetrate. I came to realize this at an early age, which has stood me ... read more..

06 May

Clean Jokes

Pastor Tim

3144

Before and After Children

*Before and After Children*BEFORE Children: I was thankful for the opportunity to vacation in exotic foreign countries so I could experience a different way of life in a new culture.AFTER Children: I read more..

05 May

Rev. Spence Laycock

3214

Glorify Thy Name

There's a thing that we do in all cultures and in all languages that is the same. It is so common that we almost don't even think of the significance of it. For a parent it's a privilege, for children... read more..

05 May

Clean Jokes

Pastor Tim

4026

Goober Mechanic

When my husband and I arrived at an automobile dealership to pick up our car, we were told that the keys had been accidentally locked in it. We went to the service department and found a mechanic work... read more..

05 May

Clean Jokes

Pastor Tim

3095

Things Mom Doesn't Want To Hear

"Mom's List Of Things She Does Not Want To Hear"1. I swallowed the goldfish.2. Your lipstick works better than crayons.3. Does grape juice leave a stain?4. The principal called...5. But DAD says read more..

04 May

Clean Jokes

Pastor Tim

4214

Real Newspaper Ads

These are real ads from a newspaper. 1. 1 MAN, 7 WOMAN HOT TUB -- $850 or best offer 2. AMANA WASHER $100. OWNED BY CLEAN BACHELOR WHO SELDOM WASHED. 3. SNOW BLOWER FOR SAL... read more..

Prayer - Our Daily Communication With God

04 May

Barb's Mantle

Barbara Sanders

4960

Prayer - Our Daily Communication With God

Communication is something many of us are not very good at. We have problems communicating in our marriages, with our children, on the job, or perhaps even with our closest friends. Most of us want to... read more..

04 May

Clean Jokes

Pastor Tim

2775

Name Problem

It was the beginning of term at a primary school in Brooklyn. The teacher asked the children their names one at a time, and for each to spell their name out loud. When she came to a young boy and as... read more..

03 May

Cybersalt Shaker

Pastor Tim

5338

Mortal Melancholy

Springtime has returned to my backyard with full bloom. This seasonal reality is nowhere more evident than in the branches of a very large, decorative cherry tree in our backyard that boasts and displ... read more..

03 May

Clean Jokes

Pastor Tim

3535

Longevity Answer

The Jewish Chronicle had heard that Benny was coming up to his 110th birthday so they sent one of their reporters to interview him."How do you account for your longevity?" asked the reporter."You coul... read more..

03 May

Clean Jokes

Pastor Tim

4238

Take Two Instead

A man takes a photo of the front of his house to the local copy store and asks the clerk to put it on disk for him. He does. They are both looking at the monitor to see the results, and the man asks i... read more..

02 May

Clean Jokes

Pastor Tim

4162

Speeding Stories

*PULLED OVER* "Hey you! Pull over!" shouted the traffic cop. The lady complied, and the judge next day fined her twenty-five dollars.She went home in great anxiety lest her husband, who always read more..

02 May

Melva's Devotions

Melva Cooper

4698

Gordon's Challenge at Talladega

NASCAR fans love the challenge that goes with restrictor-plate racing at Talladega Superspeedway! Jeff Gordon had the dominating car Sunday at the Aaron's 499 Nextel Cup race. But, the win was not wit... read more..

02 May

Clean Jokes

Pastor Tim

2816

Cow Help

A man was driving down a country road in the middle of dairy farm country when his car stalled inexplicably. He got out and raised the hood to see if he could find out what had happened.A brown and w... read more..

01 May

Clean Jokes

Pastor Tim

3889

Goober Pilots

Two Goobers (pilots) are trying to land an airplane. They start descending and as they touch the ground the one pilot screams to the other pilot, "Pull up, the runaway is ending...". The second... read more..

01 May

Dr. Harold McNabb

3565

Observations About an Unknown God

Is there anyone here today who would say, "I never win anything"? You go to the concert and the door prize is never for you, and the service club raffle always goes to someone else? I have good news f... read more..

01 May

Clean Jokes

Pastor Tim

4607

Rules For Choosing A Superhero Name

*Rules For Choosing A Superhero Name*1. Don't call yourself by your real name: e.g., Ms. Jenny Pinchuck, The Amazing Stevie Foster.2. Don't call yourself by someone else's real name: e.g., Mr. Teddy K read more..